Yesturday I watched a complete season of a show I’d never seen bofore. As I analyzed the main character’s reactions, actions and situation…it was as if I was seeing myself. Although I hadn’t gone through the same ordeals he was still in greif and the, suddenly it hit me! That was what I had become…reckless, insenstive to my body’s physical and emotional pain and obssesed by one thing. Then another thing happed, during one of the episodes, the charcter reavealed he had been abused and since then had become reckless, and didn’t care infiltrating the world of prostitution. I watched all the episodes and it was as if I was seening myself. So many things connected me to the main character. Although I have never done prositution, I had thought about it in my teen years when we could barely make it through winter. I felt as if whatever it would be it could never be worst than being abused my my own father. The show helped me look at the character’s actions through a critial eye, and better understand myself. Unfortunately it didn’t help me find a way to share my terrible secret with my mother. My brother shall never know I’ll make sure of it … he doesn’t need to know, but my mother does. I’m fed up of her thinking that man was an angel. The way she talks about him as if he was a hero makes me sick. The fact it went on for years and she either never found out or knew and didn’t say a word makes me sick! Somehow seening that show made me think… I’ve gone this far on my own and its only a begining!
When you start to relate with a TV show, its time you start to get out more and maybe find a GF or BF.
That and find a really good therapist!!!!
mean response :(
I’m not sure why you dont want to tell your brother, but if there isnt a specific reason i think you should share this with him. If you two are even remotely close, i do think that you should share this with him because the man who abused you was his father as well and your brother has a right to know how much pain you went through and how your guyz dad isnt what he thought he was. Just my thoughts, for all i know your brothers an ass and hates you lol.
just wanna say im extremely sorry for what you went through and my deepest sympathies go out to you.
good luck with your mom
Tough stuff you are dealing with. When and if you are ready, it can be a huge release to talk about it.
*hugs*