married under pressure
Posted by anonymous in Spouse on Apr 18th, 2011 | 7 commentsi was pressured by my parents to marry my husband though i loved someone else. my husband is nice and kind but we’re so different that i just cant love him..i try so hard..but i feel nothing for him…and i cant bear to have him touch me…and i keep thinking of my lost love who i couldnt marry because of religious differences between our families…i still love him and he still loves me…and i just cant help but hate and resent my husband everyday though its not his fault that im married to him but my parents’ fault….now i dont know what to do..
7 Responses to “ “married under pressure”
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I don’t know which religion you believe in, but I’m Muslim and I know exactly what you’re going through.
Have you spoken to your husband? Does he know how you feel for the other guy?
surrender to your husband, he was chosen for you by your parents. they know better than you. in time you will feel that you are his. this happens with the first baby. a woman’s place is with her husband, and a daughter is obedient to her father.
it is time for you forget about what cannot and must not be and accept the place that was chosen for you.
Parents know better than you but they dont know what you really want. Arrange marriage may work for you but it’s not for everyone.
Im sorry but that is incredibly old fashioned I almost feel sorry for you for even beleiving this is true. just because other cultures do things one way, or becuase it used to be done, doenst make it right..
so some cultures the father breaks the daugther in for her future husband… some cultures still do it now.. does that make it right? HELL no.
Being married for someone you dont love, being misreable, for 50 years is not living. women deserve to be happy too.
she may find her husband feels the same way, perhaps he doesnt really love her either.
the only reason most of these marriages work is because its against their relgion to be divorced so the women live in misery for ever. not a fun way to live.
Hey ladie!@Sandra
It’s 2011… Don’t you think that it’s time for women to take their place! I understand that it’s a religion thing, but you seriously telling her to be miserable all her life for the sake of the family/religion!?!
I am from a catholic background and it has done a lot of damage on people and families for many centuries; by menacing, by forcing them to have more babies, by forcing women to stand by their husband even if they were abusing…and it goes on and on. At some point, people got tire of all that crap and stop going to church because they realized that some of the church/values are just not right. So here we are, in 2011, free from that sh.. able to think and choose for ourselves.
All I’m saying is you have to break the chain to be free.
You only live this life once you can let your happiness slip away or you can grab hold of it. the choice is yours to make not your parents
Wow, that’s tough. I don’t want to give you advice because I am not in your shoes. However, if you end up staying with your husband, please do not force your daughter/son into an arranged marriage. I believe marriage should be a choice.