I’m so tired. Last year my husband if 2 years forced me to leave him 6 months pregnant with our daughter (domestic violence situation). I have been with my parents for a year and am working on a divorce (further complicated because I never reported abuse to the police). I love my baby, and I know that she deserves better than what she would have had if we were together, but I miss my husband. I feel like I only left to protect her (which is why I still won’t go back), but I don’t deserve any better than what I had and if it wasn’t for keeping her safe I never would have left (even if it killed me). I really believe at this point that the only reason I am alive is because of something happened to me she would go to him. If that wasn’t the case, I would just kill myself.