I’m learning from a big mistake

I’ve been with my wife for ten years. We’ve been through hell and happiness, thick and thin. I love her with all my heart. She is a special person, but I have to admit,although we are best friends, I have not always been the best person to her. I can’t not forgive myself, for I am only human and we learn from our mistakes and get stronger from them. The past year had been really tough financially, physically, and emotionally. Much to our joy we learned that she was expecting, then only to find out that the insurance would not cover her pregnancy. It stressed us both to the max. It was also rough throughout the whole pregnancy on a physical note. She didn’t want much to do with me. I let it slide off as best as possible. After all she was carrying my child. But matters only got worse. My daughter was born and spent a week in ICU. One month later my wife took a job in another state, much to my dissapproval for the pay did not justify the move and seperation between us. I found myself alone, seperated from wife and child for months, trying to sell the house and find a new job, while paying all the bills we used to share plus the kids medical expenses. My stress level had gone above and beyond. I found myself overwhelmed, stressed, depressed, sexless for 13 months too and I caved in with a one-night stand on a night where I had a few too many to drink. I felt guilt ridden and ashamed at first, but then saw the big picture. Our communication had failed. We were on two seperate pages. Let it be me that made the mistake. I will strive to improve what should have been addressed from the very beginning- my true feelings, our needs, obstacles that should have been discussed prior to getting in this situation. Perhaps this could work for the better and only strengthen our bond!