Seeking an affair
Posted by Reaching for M in Sex on Jun 4th, 2010 | 16 commentsAfter being in a sexless and loveless marriage for the past 5 years I am reaching out to my ex tomorrow to hopefully rekindle what we once had. I have not seen him in 10 years but yet I still think about him constantly. He was the Love of my life and the best sex I have ever had. He is all I can think about.
My husband is an emotionally abusive man who refuses to go to counseling. When I confront him about the lack of sex in our marriage he just shrugs and says it is normal. I am only 29 years old and I can’t remain in a marriage that is so empty. Yet because of financial and medical reasons I can not leave him.
I can’t wait to talk to my ex tomorrow. I have heard through the grapevine that his marriage is just a crappy as mine and that they are now sleeping in seperate rooms. I hope we can at least have one night together so that I will have something to think about and hold onto to get me through the next 10 years. I know this makes me an awful person but I have fought the desire for too long and now I am giving in. It’s been too hard of a fight and I am caving in. I just hope that he caves too.
16 Responses to “ “Seeking an affair”
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DO WHAT YOUR HEART SAYS …. AND TRY TO ENJOY TO THE FULLEST ………..
JUST DO IT
let us know …what happens … i am excited to know
absolutely sista! do it! nothing worse then craving contact with your partner, know all too well that empty feeling…. You will enjoy yourself and your body will love you for it! bet it takes 5 years off your age ; ) YOu’ll feel alive again!!!!!
but I do have to say… no matter the reason, you need to get out of your crappy marriage, 30 is your prime baby!!!! you are a sexual diva and you need your king to be there to give you whatever you need… anytime.. anywhere.. THIS is what all men wait for!!!! for their wives to finally be where they were at 18!!!!!
Keep us posted!! : )
Wow, what a bunch of idiots.
Just get the divorce. Finances will work themselves out and you’re obviously miserable where your at – quit being such a coward. And going back to your ex is moronic at best. You divorced him for a reason too – what makes you think it’s going to give you something THIS time?
Divorce your husband and look for someone new. 20 minutes of sex isn’t going to get you through 10 years, cheating on your husband willl give him grounds to divorce your silly ass without paying alimony and your going to hurt his wife, her family, her kids, your ex, your husband (even if he is a ****), and make everyone think less of you. Cheating hurts everyone – quit being so god damn selfish and do the right thing for once.
i agree with anon. you are going about this in completely the wrong way! get out of your marriage and learn to love yourself. why cheat? it’s just plain wrong, you can get out of your marriage, you just think you can’t. learn to be alone and realize some guy isn’t going to make you happy, you need to work on yourself!
I sent him an email, now the ball is in his court. I just hope that it is the correct email address. Please be the right address! I just hope I hear from him, even if I don’t see him, it would just be amazing to hear his voice.
I thought I would feel guilty about contacting him, but all I feel is anxious. Anxious about whether or not he will reply. I guess I am a horrible person, I never in a million years thought I would do something like this but I can’t get him out of my head. I have missed him so much through the years that my heart would literally hurt when I thought of him or heard someone mention his name. I would feel like I couldn’t breathe when I thought of him, like my chest was being ripped out. I guess I couldn’t take it anymore and so I put myself out there. I just hope he’ll reply or I am going to be devestated.
If he doesn’t answer call me I will be more than happy to have non commital sex with you
So screw your ‘true love’s’ wife, her kids, her family, your ‘true love’, and everyone else as long as you get a self esteem boost, right? You’re a real class act.
I hope you get crushed.
k 1st u havent had sex in 5 years your 29 and ur husbands a jerk hun if u cheat on him u just become as bad as him u have to divorce him the marriage is in ruins and you deserve better
Get divorced, find a job that has healthcare benefits or a new husband that provide them and go get yourself laid honey. Everyone wins
Do you not realize that by having health issues it makes it easier to leave your husband???? There are women shelters for abused women and hotlines you can call. Just google it. It sounds like you dont want to leave but just wanna have a good time. Just know God will hold you accountable for cheating. GO TO A WOMENS SHELTER!!
He didn’t reply, so I guess I did get crushed. It really sucks and I am heartbroken, but I guess that is the way it goes. I am going to take this to mean that he is now happy in his marriage and that makes it better. As long as he is happy then that makes me happy too. I will go on and try to be content in mine.
And for those who said I should get a job and leave my husband, I have a job. He doesn’t have one and he is on my insurance. He has a preexisting condition and can’t get private insurance so I have to stay with him. He would be broke and in poor health without me. Life really sucks sometimes :(
he can apply for disability, there are options it’s 2010 or his family can take care of him, it’s not your responsibility. or help him financially every month… think outside of the box, stay away from men and find yourself.. sounds to me like your life revolves around other people and not you, at least go to therapy. you sound way too frustrated and unhappy
It sounded in the beginning that you were the one relying on him for your medical needs, but now I see it’s the other way around. If he is emotionally abusive and unwilling to get help and you are at the point that you want to sleep with your ex, then get out of there. He’s already violated the terms of marriage by being abusive and if he is saying it’s normal that the two of you are not having sex at age 29……NOT NORMAL!
You already have a job and insurance so get out of there, you’ll be just fine sweetie. He’s not taking care of you so you don’t need to take care of him. If you don’t want to get divorced right away, perhaps you can discuss a separation so you both can benefit, but if he is the type that sees you as property then make it a clean split.
Live a happy life that you can be open and honest with. You are too young to feel so trapped, you are the one keeping yourself there. You don’t want to look back with regret knowing you didn’t make the most of your life. Best of luck to you.
your ex is your ex for a reason.
I think you need to really sit down with your husband and make him realise how unhappy and serious you are