My life was forever changed and all he could do was shrug

After a long, dysfunctional “relationship” with a guy who was my friend and lover but never actually my boyfriend, I finally broke free of it. Only to relapse into missing him and hanging out with him once more “as friends” a year later. We had always been ‘drinking buddies’ and thus, the night we hung out we proceeded to have a few beers and hang out how we used to–laughing, watching tv, talking on the balcony. It was a seemingly good turn of the times…

Stupidly, we ended up sleeping together in a very drunken state..him coming onto me, at first I resisted, but gave in. I ended up getting genital herpes from him that night from oral sex. It was my initial outbreak, as proven by bloodtest (lack of antibodies in blood, but confirmation of virus on skin.) He has never shown signs of it, but it turned out to be type 1 –the cold sore variety. Today, I also broke out with my first ever cold sore and it’s HORRIBLE.

This has changed my life, my self-esteem, how I feel about my sexuality, dating, being able to touch my body and now my face.

I was free! Why oh whhhhhyyyy did I hang out with him?!
When I told him, he shrugged. HE SHRUGGED. He refused to get tested, never did. He goes on unphased–symptom-free, probably being careless and not taking precautions with anyone else….and me…I am forever changed.