Lost

I think I love my boyfriend. He’s a pretty good guy. But I also think I’m not in love with him, possibly I never was. I know I won’t be as happy as I could really be, if I stay. But it would break his heart, it would break him. So it’s easier to do nothing, to change nothing, but it’s making me hate myself because I know I’ll regret this when I’m older – either just for the time I lost or maybe because I’ll still be with him and I’ll never know what it’s like to actually be with someone who makes you feel butterflies in your stomach. And I know how that feels, it happened to me a couple times in my life. Just not with him…