I blame myself…

My best friend is dead. She was abducted, raped, and murdered. I honestly blame myself and their are many reasons why.
Reason one is that because I got caught stealing something, I stopped getting rides in the morning from a friend, and consequently, so did she.
Reason two is that I was supposed to walk to school with her and I didn’t.
Reason three is that she went to my house that morning and I wasn’t there, that’s why she was where she was and why she was alone.
If none of this had happened, she’d be alive.
It will have been 3 years ago soon and I still blame myself.