I cheated on my bf online…

I was bored one night, and decided to go on an IRC sex chatroom, not with the intent of actually engaging in the stuff they do there, but just out of curiousity to see how many idiots I could find. This one guy started talking to me in a personal window, and things got weird really quickly… Like, he was talking about all the things he wanted to to do me, and I was making no effort to stop him because it was giving me a sick thrill… So I was basically some random guy’s good time, while my caring, loving boyfriend is clueless. I don’t know why I did it and it hasn’t happened since, but as soon as I left my computer screen I started crying and the memory of it disgusts me…

A kiss

I am close to someone and spend alot of time with her. Suddenly, without warning I started wanting to kiss her so bad that it hurts. I try to keep this feeling locked inside but I can’t help it. If she were anyone else in this world I would find a way to win her over and make it happen but there is no one more out of reach to me. I can never tell her this. I can never let it become obvious. I’m afraid that this feeling may one day ruin the close frienship we have. Sometimes I think there is a tiny chance she would do it someday. Like maybe deep inside she wants to kiss me too. But that thought is like torture to me. There is too much to lose to find out. I do not understand why I want this so bad with this person. It’s just a kiss. I hope this feeling fades away as fast as it can.

Gay and In Love

I’m gay and I haven’t told my parents. I’m also in love with a girl who already has a girlfriend. She completes me…and I can’t imagine my life without her. She knows, and says she loves me too, but doesn’t want to break up with her girlfriend because it would ruin their friendship. Also, we live on opposite sides of the world. I feel so guilty but at the same time I wish she would just admit it…and come to me. I would die without her…I really would.

I Used to think rape was cool…

I was molested when I was 12. Then I always envisioned rape as the best type of sex since your in control. I have prayed alot over the last 4 years for forgiveness and am now just coming to terms with how bad that was. I am so glad I dont think rape is okay anymore.

Does it make me less of a woman?

I’m 29, happily married, happily teaching grade one, settled down, at the point where everyone is expecting me to have a baby. But I don’t want to have kids. But how can I go around saying that? Everyone will judge me, thinking I’m a terrible person. Also, it will upset my parents and in-laws. It’s not that I don’t love kids (obviously, since I teach grade one), I don’t know if I’m mentally healthy enough. I have an eating disorder, and I suffer from depression. But I can’t go around telling people all that, now can I? Also, I love my freedom. I want to see the world, live in other countries. I don’t want to be settled down in a small prairie town, toting my three kids off to soccer practice. Am I a bad person?

LUSTING

I lust after my gf’s 16 yr old niece.I masterbate to her myspace pics. I think about her when i have sex with my gf..

Love my wife, but crazy for another

I love my wife. She’s the best thing that’s happened to me and we have a good life.

But I’m crazy about another. I’m not trying to cheat, and thankfully she has a serious boyfriend, so I doubt she’d pursue anything with me anyway. But she’s fantastic, and I can’t breathe unless I hear from her. She left for a week and I was sad that she was gone, just felt incomplete. I enjoy spending time with her personally and professionally. She’s fun, smart, beautiful, caring, cute, nice to everyone, and we just click.

I don’t want to leave my wife, its not even an option in my mind. But I do wish I could spend one day free with this other girl. Just one day where I could take care of her, not even do anything sexual. Just enjoy each other’s company in private, and hold her close. We’re already close colleagues/friends. To just once feel that closeness with her in mind and body, forgetting about the outside world. Just once, that would be enough.

Lost

I think I love my boyfriend. He’s a pretty good guy. But I also think I’m not in love with him, possibly I never was. I know I won’t be as happy as I could really be, if I stay. But it would break his heart, it would break him. So it’s easier to do nothing, to change nothing, but it’s making me hate myself because I know I’ll regret this when I’m older – either just for the time I lost or maybe because I’ll still be with him and I’ll never know what it’s like to actually be with someone who makes you feel butterflies in your stomach. And I know how that feels, it happened to me a couple times in my life. Just not with him…

KILLING ME

I was looking at stuff I shouldn’t be looking at after I was told not to look t it an feel EXTREMLY guilty

I Like Being Upset..

I dont know why, but i’ve realized that i like to be depressed/upset/sad.. i love the feeling.. and i dont know why. feels as if its just me who feels like this.. i start therapy this week, but i wonder if i should tell them that i feel like that, maybe they’ll think im mental..