RSSim going crazy
I think I’m going crazy. I’m married and I was having an affair with a man who was also married for almost 8mo. I was literally falling in love with him, he would go to extremes just to see me even if it was for 5 minutes. Everything was perfect. The sex was great. His wife found out about us and asked me to stop seeing him so I tried and he wouldn’t let me and told me that he was going to take me away from my husband. About a week after his wife found out about the affair he was killed. His wife called me and told me that he was shot and died at the scene. My heart sank and now Im going crazy… its been 3mo since he passed and I cant get over it. I miss him so much… I have considered hurting myself because of it.
alone on September 17th 2008 in Love
Carlie said on 21 Sep 2008 at 11:57 pm # Quote
OH My GOD! I am soooo sorry for you. I too was having an affair with a married man for three years and I too am married. We fell hard for each other and loved each other more than anything in this world! His wife found out the first year this started and we still kept it going… Just like your love wanted. But two months ago she found out again and now he has gone back to her and his boys. I came clean with my husband and he wants to work things out. But I just ache for the love that I lost. I havent seen him since and I know or feel I never will. She threatened to take his kids away to another state. I know that he is still alive and around, unlike your love. But I am going through the same grieving process as if he died. I am living my life at home in a fog and just going about life because I am “supposed too” I too am going crazy with no one to talk too. I started counseling but that doesnt seem to be working. I guess what I am trying to say is that you are not alone and there are alot of us put here, the other woman….going through similar situations. Take care…..
Onche said on 04 Oct 2008 at 2:37 am # Quote
U should try turning the tables around. Assume U were in his wife’s shoes, how would U feel knowing some other married woman was adamantly having a sex affair with Ur husband? Hw would u feel if u were being true to Ur own husband and found he had been sleeping with another woman for 8months?
What exactly is “perfect” in a “wrong” relationship. I dont mean to be judgemental but have U looked at what u thought U had going with any rationale at any time? U are married. He was married…
his wife found out. He got killed a week later, after U refused to end ur affair with him…
Ur not confronting the real issues here. U should wake up and see what the problem is. U could go crazy all U want. It doesnt make anything better. As for killing Urself, it sounds appealing now until Ur dead. There’s no marriage in the after life. trust me on this.
Georgie said on 04 Oct 2008 at 12:09 pm # Quote
Are you sure his wife wasn’t the one who shot him?
Sherika (Jamaica) 17+ said on 06 Oct 2008 at 4:41 pm # Quote
The only thing left for u to do now is ask God for forgiveness, guidance and protection.
Secondly pray and pray hard everyday, fast, do everything to prove to God that u really are asking for forgiveness for the adultery that u both committed.
Thirdly..start spending more time with ur husband..try to bond…try to rediscover y u fell in love with him at first. By ur effort im sure he will draw closer to u [if he havent been trying doing that all long] and u will draw closer to him.
Last but not least..spend more romantic evenings together…dinner, candle light..stuff like that.
Please I know it might seem hard. But u are not responsible for his death!! Dont allow the devil to trap u into thinking NEGATIVELY.
Seek God first. My best wishes to u.
Anonymous said on 10 Nov 2008 at 12:12 pm # Quote
No offense, but this sounds a little overexaggerated. I don’t know, I think it’s because of the part where he got killed. He got killed a week after, but you never mentioned why or who could possibly kill him. It could be his wife, but I highly doubt that. Yeah…another thing is why the he’ll didn’t either of you get a divorce? You said you two were falling in love with each other, so why bother leading on your husband. Of course he’ll get hurt, but he’ll understand and get over it. I know it’s not place to say any of this when I don’t know anything at all, but I’d just like to state out my own perspective about this.
Michael said on 06 Dec 2008 at 1:54 pm # Quote
You have already hurt yourself enough. He was very special to you. The excitement and thrill from all of the barriers made it that much more meaningful when you did see him. While the fantasy of a life for the two of you is incredible, you never had that time together. If you had he would be as accessable to you as your email and the romance would be gone. You said it yourself, “he would go to extremes just to see me even if it was for 5 minutes. Everything was perfect.”
If it was truely perfect extremes wouldn’t have been necessary. You feel in love with the thrill, not the man. But the good news is there are two good ways to move past this.
1) Find another man with an extreme situation liek the first… or
2) FIgure out why you are only happy when love is destructive.
Morgan said on 16 Dec 2008 at 12:34 am # Quote
omg i am so sorry, but you shouldnt hurt yourself over it.. sometimes you just have to let things go. But was it the wife?
duh said on 31 Dec 2008 at 7:44 pm # Quote
maybe the wife just told you he died to get you to stop trying to see him. i bet he’s alive.
but you’re still an idiot.
anon said on 01 Jan 2009 at 4:31 am # Quote
omg wake up! you want to hurt yourself over some guy whose life you wrecked?! what about your husband? where does he fall in all this? that’s sad. just sad your husband should leave you