Happy birthday

I’ve had people wishing me happy birthday all day.

They don’t realise that I loathe myself, and hate this day above all days. I wish I’d never been born. That I’d never fathered my three children who have to grow up with me as their father, slowly but surely infecting them with my cynicism at a world where everyone can justify their hate whether through their claimed religion, or justify it by “reason and logic”.

I don’t kill myself because I don’t want to destroy my children’s lives because I hate my own.