Wracked by guilt

I feel like a convict on the run, I feel like everyone knows I am a morally reprehensible criminal. I’ve let it take over my life and out of guilt I don’t allow myself any opportunity to be happy. The worst part is that I don’t even know that I did anything, I was blacked out drunk and this all started from a flash of a memory that might have been from a dream(nightmare) and the fact that everyone started acting weird. Now it has gone on so long even if I found out that I didn’t do anything it’s become a part of my personality. I wish constantly that I would die or wake up from this nightmare.