Tragic Tale of Life
Posted by Anonymous in Guilt on Oct 26th, 2008 | 19 commentsI was raped two to three times a week from my seventh grade year to my freshman year in high school by someone I considered a grandfather figure. I’m now a senior in high school. To this day after everything, I can’t hate him. Yet at times I hate myself for letting it happen especially for as long as it did. I have flashbacks frequently, and I feel as if I don’t deserve to be happy (I don’t know if this is from the rape or not, but I assume it is).
I hate that I can’t hate him for what he did. He’s roaming free and carelessly, while I have to live with the pain and scars every single day for the rest of my life.
19 Responses to “ “Tragic Tale of Life”
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From the bottom of my heart, I hope one day you get the solace you need.
Have you told someone and gone to the police aboutthis. That is what needs to happen!!! No one willl help you if you don’t help yourself!
Please go to the RAINN (Rape Abuse Incest National Network) website:
http://www.rainn.org/
under “Get Help” you can either get their toll-free hotline or you can go to their online help and try to speak to someone about this so you can get some of it off your chest and then get some very helpful advise from then.
I am sorry I forgot to add that I am so sorry this happened to you and NONE of it is your fault.
First of all I want to remind you that it’s not your fault. You don’t have to be ashamed of telling somebody because being raped doesn’t mean that your a lesser person than anybody else. You have to be strong and try to make him take responsibility of his actions. You deserve to fight for yourself. Be strong and believe that you deserve better things in life and fight for it.
I forgot to add that when my mom found out about this, it stopped but she did nothing. She didn’t notify the police or anything. I hate her for it.
that is terrible… go beyond your mothers authority and report it. it doesn’t matter that it was 3 years ago. it still happened and it hurt you. he needs to get what he deserves.
You may even love .. and this makes you even angrier at yourself..
You’ve been mind raped as well as body raped.
You deserve better..
Now..do you want to stay the victim your whole life or would you like to turn the jerk in..and reclaim yourself.
yes you can~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
yes you can
I have been told personally by rape victims that reporting their rapist is something they never regret. Even if the rapist isn’t convicted, everyone will always have doubts about him, and he will no longer be able to walk around care-free. So I urge you to go with someone to the police, and report this bastard.
I am sorry to hear that this happened to you, no one deserves that. Please think of others he could hurt, like he has hurt you. What if he is currently doing this to someone else? Can you live not doing everything you can to stop him so that others do not have to go through this? I know it is hard, believe me, but you must stand up for yourself and protect others!
I wish you all the best and I have great faith in your ability to do this! Take care!
hate tis not always easy , yet what would it give you to hate him ?
what happened was horrific agreed , now you can choose to let it fester n eat you alive or to grow n win by showing him that you have taken back the control he once had
{ consider reporting him even if you dont hate him as am sure youd hate him to do the same to your lil sis or any other
Best Wishes Breathtaker
I’m so sorry to hear you went through this!
I, too, was sexually assaulted as a teenager. When I was 15 my godfather, who was 63, at the time, assaulted me while I was spending the night at his home.
I blamed myself for MONTHS and didn’t tell a soul until his harassment got to me and I snapped.
You need to know that it was not your fault in any way shape or form. He is and was the adult. He was in a position of authority and even though you may think you should have said no, it’s not that easy.
Be strong and try and get help.
Know that cases like this are never a one time thing. Chances are, he’s done this to many other girls and knows how to get away with it.
You need to stand up and take charge or your life and your body because no one else will do it for you. It will be hard but know that you are not only helping yourself but countless other girls in your position.
Be a role model!
I know that in my case, it’s been 3 years of suffering. The police have called me a liar too many time but I know that I need to keep strong as an example to others that they CAN beat this and they CAN make a difference in their own lives and the lives of other young victims.
Be strong my dear. You’re not alone and never will be!
My heart is with you!
NOT YOUR FAULT. Please talk to someone. Ur in my Prayers
i’m so sorry for what happened
i hope you heal…it will take a while and it might feel like forever, like you can’t breath, like you can’t go on but keep at it
much love to you
report him. even if anonynmously. and why are you still living in pain? you didn’t do it. shit happens. that’s life. you can move on and feel good / strong about yourself. noone can take that from you. you think only virgins feel good about themselves? you can too.
Report him, please report him. He can go ahead and do it to another young girl, those people never stop… Your mom was wrong for not reporting. She was probably trying to protect you, but it’s wrong… And forgive yourself completely, it wasn’t you dear, you were just a child. He’s a monster and he should pay for what he did. Don’t feel bad about yourself.
I agree with this! please , please, report him!you will be saving some other girls/boys life. Something like this happened to a friend of mine when she was a kid and her family didn’t report it for fear of people finding out, I guess they were trying to protect their daughter from the attention.
Guess what happened? the rapist (an older man as well) moved to another state and did the same thing to a couple of other kids. However one of their moms did have the balls to report him and he is thankfully now behind bars.
You can be that hero now.
Part of the problem with our society is the stigma of being a rape victim. Who hasn’t been raped these days? I guess a lucky few. Or at least that’s what I tell myself. I got raped, and I’m a dude. I never said anything, it festered. Used to be a day didn’t go by that I didn’t think about it. For a while I thought I was ok but I was just a completely out of control alcoholic. Now I just hate myself every day, I am a completely broken person who wishes every minute that I could find some way out .I’m no angel, I got pretty out of control during my drinking days, I used to black out a lot and won’t let myself see what I’m guilty of. I can’t kill myself because of the pain it would cause my family, instead I sit around and wait till I can go to sleep and escape this life in my dreams, or take risks hoping I will die.
Don’t hate yourself, you did nothing wrong, and it’s not your fault. I’m so sorry, I hope you find the help you need someday.