To Ian
Posted by Your Loving Sister in Guilt on Jan 7th, 2011 | 1 commentI’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for being healthy, when you were trapped in the hospital. I’m so sorry for being normal when you were born disabled. I’m sorry for not being sad when you were in the hospital for the millionth time. I’m sorry for playing too rough when we were small. I’m sorry for not playing enough now. I’m sorry for all the times I was embarrassed by you, or resented you for getting more attention from mom and dad. I’m sorry for hitting you when you ate my Barbie. I’m sorry for screaming when you broke my toys. I’m sorry for not being a better sister, and I’m sorry for not knowing how to help you. I’m sorry for not letting you get better care because I still want you here with me. I will always love you. If only you could read this…I’m sorry for everything.
One Response to “ “To Ian”
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You are only human, and I must admit, most of the posts in this section, “guilt”, make me sick and lose all faith in humanity…you just gave me hope…as long as you aren’t a total unforgiving gold digging **** i think you are okay. Sorry for the harsh words, but if you read the whole forum you may understand.
you are only a person, and I’m guessing your brother had some terminal illness growing up and you felt neglected…
listen sweetheart, when you are a child there are things you just don’t understand, you can’t keep blaming yourself for being human…thats like blaming yourself because you can’t live forever and fly…
I’m sorry your mind is ridden with guilt, but, try to imagine yourself as an adult (if you aren’t) with an adult Ian in heaven having laughs over this…
you aren’t a bad person unless you fall into the category i referenced in paragraph one (see above)
so if you are not in that category…let your guilt go…it is not only unnecessary, it is undeserved.
don’t torture yourself for not being perfect…Only Chuck Norris is perfect, possibly God too…