not sure I want to remain married
Posted by Allie in Guilt on Jul 15th, 2010 | 3 commentsI married him because he is my soulmate. He is 26 years older than me. The problem now is the difference between him at 55 and him now, at 72 is huge. When we met, he worked full time. now he is retired and complains every day about aches and pains; not having money; feeling bad about himself..the list goes one. I have been cheating..there have been four different guys in past four years..one i still see and speak to regularly..i cheated because i want to feel like a woman in her 40′s (and not 72)I never wanted kids but now i sometimes feel i have missed out. i care about him deeply and he is the only ‘family’ i have. but i am living a double life
3 Responses to “ “not sure I want to remain married”
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That sucks and is way too much of an age-gap. I’m sorry but it was a mistake to marry him in the first place and cheating on him isn’t right either..
If you married a man that much older, you have issues yourself.. Take a break from everything, all relationships and (I know it sounds cliche) but “find yourself” A good, qualified therapist can help you do that. Your old guy will be fine, I’m sure he’s been thru alot in his 72 years and won’t even be surprised.. Good luck to you and don’t let him guilt you, it was stupid and irresponsible for him to marry a woman as young as you, IMO he’s an old goat
honestly you have put yourself in an impossible situation. marriage is an enormous responsibility that cannot be taken lightly. Unfortunately you did not plan for this and did not consider that you will not be growing old together. He is very much growing old well before you.
so what can you do? nothing. either tell him the truth about your cheating and perhaps deal a fatal blow to your marriage, or continue on and feel crappy about yourself. personally i would do the latter because I would be scared to rock the boat.
Me, too.
My husband is 34 years my senior. I am in my sexual prime and haven’t had sex for over a year. I can’t remember the last time I had any kind of decent sex – it was before I was married.
We had our 20th anniversary last week. No card, no gift, no dinner, just a quiet evening wondering “what if” while he goes to bed early – like every other night.
Married, lonely, sad, regretful, stupid.