motherhood and addiction
Posted by AnonyMommy in Family on Nov 25th, 2010 | 3 commentsI used to do drugs, lots of them. The main one I did was meth, I started when I was 13 and by the time I was 17 I was shooting up. I got in trouble, went to jail, found God and began fixing myself. I eventually got sober, it was so hard, and then fell in love. I got pregnant soon, unexpectedly, and now I am a stay at home mom. I have chronic back pain and my doctor prescribed me pain pills for almost a year until I decided I couldn’t take them anymore. Now all I want to do is use drugs again. I love my daughter but I hate being a mother. I hate the responsibility. I feel so bad for her that she has me for her mother. Sometimes I just wish that God would kill me while she is still too young to remember me. I won’t use drugs but I wish I would have never taken the pain pills. It’s like starting all over again. I hate my life, I hate myself and I hate that I wasn’t smart enough not to involve a precious innocent little child.
3 Responses to “ “motherhood and addiction”
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Aww, I’m so sorry. The important thing is that you stopped using drugs. You sound like a wonderful loving mother to me. And I wish you the best of luck and health… God bless. :’ )
Hey, im in recovery myself, and i have been in that dark place where all you can think about is drugs. I think you should go check out a meeting, kids are allowed too if you cant have alone time to go. I am in recovery for heroin addiction, but i prefer AA meetings because they have better sobriety. Here is a link to find a meeting.
Best of Luck
http://www.aa.org/lang/en/meet.....rigpage=29
I have been a recovering alcholic for 3 years. Since the baby and all the stress of my marriage i have found muscle relaxants to get me through. I am terrified this will become another problem for me . I keep on going to meetings of AA but this is a monster i did not expect to creep up