I’m 30, still living with my parents for economic reasons. We have a good relationship. All my life they have been supportive and loving, with the ups and downs. We aren’t perfect, we argue and squabble and make up and move on.
And it’s strangling me. The nagging has been piling up. The love is getting spoiled by this resentment growing like a weed. I often catch myself thinking “God, I can’t wait for them to die already so I can live in peace” and then I feel just horrible. I want to die just because of how often I’ve come to think that. I’ve taken to hurting myself whenever I have those thoughts just to try and stop them from occurring.
I will be devastated if either of them die. And yet I’m scared that I really won’t.