Extra Marital Affair
Posted by Anonymous in Family on Jul 22nd, 2010 | 15 commentsI am happily married since 9 years.
We both love each other very very much.
I try to be most helpful & friendly to my wife.
Never had any affair before, and never hidden anything from my wife. Always keep open-heart with her.
At times, she is very jealous when I am talking with other females (in our friends or neighbours or even strangers).
But I tell her that I don’t act anything specially, but may be because of my open-heartedness or my way of talking and straightforwadness, the females themselves like to talk with me. And, I never keep any bad intentions for females.
Untill last month, when my wife went of vacation, one of our friends started calling me frequently over telephone. We shared some personal likes and dislikes while talking.
One day she told – I wanna come to your house. I welcomed her. She came in the morning when her child went to school and husband on duty.
I was really nervous, and was about to tell her not to come. But she was on her way. She came to my house, and I was unable to control (neither was she) and we slept together. She left within an hour.
This was nothing else than just an infatuation & lust – I know it very well.
But now there are two problems:
(1) I feel very guilty, as till now there was nothing that I need to hide from my wife, but this incidence I will have and have to (because we are from an orthodox background)
(2) That female has made a soft corner for me, and at times tells me ‘I love you very much’.
Please give your comments, how do I free myself.
Believe me I am too much religious and kind hearted.
How to get rid of these tensions.
15 Responses to “ “Extra Marital Affair”
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if u were that much in love with your wife and religious u wouldn’t have cheated,what a bitch even the girl u sleept with im sure its not the firt time she cheated on her huby,shame on you
I think As it is lready done now you an’t help it much.So just forget about it and start your life again and try to love your wife as you have said you already love her very much.Don’t tell her anything about this incedent as it will ruin her trust in you.And once the trust is broken it will always hurt so as you have realized your mistake just forget it and pls don’t repeat that again then only you can continue your life without guilt.Good Luck
You’re too bound up by your religion and so is your wife, that’s why this happened. I suggest encouraging your wife for the two of you to find something fun and exciting and sexually enticing to do together.. I know this will sound extreme but if you could find an orgy or something.. I have a hunch that your wife is bored with you too just as you are with her. Make religion and it’s rules less of a priority and instead work on having a relationship with God.. What has religion gotten you? A series of rules too strict to live by. Good luck
Bull. You gave yourself to another woman. If you don’t tell your wife, your cheating your wife out of information she needs in order to have the chance at loving you unconditionally. Or not. But you made your decision when you invited that woman over – you knew what would happen, that’s why you were nervous and wanted to call it off.
If you don’t tell your wife, you’re hiding your heart from her – or a part of it. You ate showing her that you love her conditionally, on the condition that she doesn’t ever find out what kind of person you rely are. If you don’t tell her, you are setting her up to love a LIE – the person you are pretending to be. How selfish are you, really?
well, I wouldnt trust the other woman, if she’s already saying she loves you, what makes you think SHE wont tell your wife, and trust me, when that day comes, and yes… it will, your wife will feel WAY more betrayed if you dont tell her first. because that woman will make it out like YOU came on to her, so she doesnt look all that bad. I’ve been on the recieving end of this conversation and let me tell you, it leaves a very sour taste in your mouth… Tell her, if you were a big enough man to have slept with someone other then your wife, you can at least have the balls enough to tell her, so she can make the decicion to stay or leave your butt… Im not a man hater, but, I mean really, come on, you slept with another woman, you obviously dont love your wife enough to have made it very clear what is appropriate conversations with other women, if a man loves her partner, then he wouldnt put himself in that situation, its call a boundary, you crossed it now pay on price for it.. was it worth it???? you best be ready for some serious grovling and begging for forgiveness…
Thank you Lola, Rush, IDK, Anon & Marie, for you replies.
To Lola & Rush: yes Lola, I really feel shame, and also you are correct, even I think that lady would have slept with others also, and cheated is huby. Now, I will just finish the chapter.
Anyways the chapter has only 2 topics – 1. our family friendship with them,
&
2. that days incident.
So topic 2, I will scratch it out from my mind & convince that bi*** to do so.
To IDK: yes IDK, even you are correct. I am a mad-dreamer of the ways & situations for wife-husband making fun, but my wife is not able to cope up. I told several times, that I am a variety lover, if she tries, she can make me mad in the bedroom, but…..anyways. I will keep trying.
To Anon: Dear Anon, I have always try to be the perfect husband.
I frequently keep asking my wife about her satisfactions, whether it is emotional or physical or materialistic.
I am less a husband to her, and we both are best-friends more.
I agree that hiding from her will be cheating her. But as Marie tells, telling this to her will really make our lives sour, and not only sour…but, I can’t imagine the consequences.
Marie, she is also a mother, and hence I keep reminding her never to think anything further, as you are a mother, and our society can never accept any changes further. We can never ever think of being together in this birth.
(This is just what I am telling her to keep her shut, for me it was just an accident, and I want to forget it)
My wifey is the only one who can take place in my heart as my beloved, my partner, my lover & my best friend.
I madly love my wife.
And I pray God that our love never shatters.
Writer of the Post, It’s very nice that you addressed each person individually. As a woman, I just wanted to give you some ideas on how to perhaps make your wife a little more playful..
Most importantly, in my opinion is compliment her body, let her know how much she turns you on. Talk and whisper things to her during sex.. A woman biggest sex organ is her brain. Let her know how much you want her.
Also see what happens if you begin to help her around the house.. A woman will feel more relaxed and ready for sex if they are less stressed. Help her wash dishes or clothes, take care of kids, etc. Ask her what she would like help with.. Try doing these things, little by little your situation may change
Dear IDK, thank you so much for the tips that you have given.
But in fact, you want believe, I look after mostly all the house-hold works when I am at house, and I really enjoy helping her.
But the new thing that I have known is whispering while we are together. I don’t know why, but she stays mute with eyes closed always when we are having our privacy. But now I will try to make her talk, and keep her eyes open too.
Once again, thanks for your tips.
Her physique is in no ways appreciable :) but even I’ll do that (as you may know all the men are the best actors)
I think that you should not tell her!! I believe that everyone cheats intheir own way. Some consider fantasy, toys, and even masterbation cheating too. DO NOT ruin your fsmily over a fling! That you acknowledge what you have done is an indication that you have a conscience. Some people cheat and feel no remorse but you. That you are on this site is an indication that you are conflicted. How will telling your wife about this bring any value to your marriage. I speak from experience that if you tell her, you will destroy her safe place and she will never look at you the same! You are a human being!! This is not absolution; it is a fact!! Your guilt stems from how you feel about youself – I get it, so suffer in silence; you owe her and your family this much. Go and use this as a spring board to show compassion to others who suffer various other human frailties. I wish you the best – now get some, do some introspecting and regain your compsure so that this experience can indirectly help other!!!! Forgive yourself.
I really wonder how you would feel if she did something like this and didn’t tell you. It’s sad that you dont have a strong enough relationship to tell her the truth. it’s sad that she has to live her life with a dirt bag like you. I pray for you and your family. your wife should be with someone who will treat her better and honestly you dont have the balls to tell her.
Do you come on these site simply to judge people? A mistake was made, it was wrong, the man feels bad, it doesn’t make him evil. Get a life.
Everyone makes mistakes, dont beat yourself up about it. All you can do is keep your self control in the future and be good to your wife, you sound like you have leart your lesson. Get off his back everyone, like you havent stuffed up before.
forget everything & look forward.