There’s nothing left

This morning, I woke up and realized it’s over. There are no feelings except a sad hollowness. I did a stupid thing and put my whole life into another person and his life. I’m left with a family that doesn’t understand even a little of what I am, and his family pulling away from me because I’m just an ex. I poured myself into a life that has evaporated and I have nothing to show for it. I can’t find a job, I live with my ex-in-laws, and I f***** my whole life up. I’m almost thirty and unaccomplished everything I thought I wanted. This morning I realized I don’t really want to live. I’m always tired. That’s my life experience. I have wrinkles and hurt feelings, no marriage and no children, no livelihood and no love. I’m an empty husk. I am nothing. The time for the end is closer much faster than I thought it would be. Alright, so be it.

4 thoughts on “There’s nothing left

  1. Please get help. Find,through community services ,where you can get free psychological help. Believe me, it won’t get better on your own. I’m 55 and feel my whole life is a sham.

  2. Please, please, please don’t do anything harmful to yourself. Find or reach out to someone who you think you can trust, or a therapist if you can manage it, and be plain about your feelings. And age is just a number- your life isn’t over if you don’t reach any major benchmarks before you turn 30. It sounds like you’re going through Hell, and I’m sorry about that, but keep going. Dante had to travel through Hell before he reached Heaven.

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