I have everything. A wife, kids, house, high paying job. My wife and I never have sex. I hadn’t put with my kids all weekend long…. But i want to die. I once was hospitalized for 6 weeks for an injury and it was one of the most relaxing time in my life. . Not a care in the world. I slept as much as i wanted. My wife said I looked more healthy in there than at home. I fantasize about getting a terminal illness….. Cuz that would be an honorable way to go. And….. My death would be predictable. I could make a list of what my last year would entail. Im just so tired of getting up every day. I told my wife once flippantly… “I wanna kill myself” She didn’t care in the heart of that moment…… “If that makes you wanna kill yourself you have real problems”….. Thats what she said. Please let me sleep. I’m exhausted. I want my kids…. I guess divorce could help. But right now it’s hard to imagine surviving the pain in the ass a divorce would be.