I’m 23 and I keep drinking to the point of blacking out. I wake up regretting everything and hating life. It’s driving my loved ones away. The longest in a couple years I’ve been sober was a month. I just have no idea what to do with myself sober. I hate everything about myself and am so uninterested in anything. I wouldn’t kill myself but I think about dying all the time.
I feel like you need to go get yourself checked into a rehab center if it gets worse. If you don’t know what to do with yourself when sober, find a hobby – do something that you like, other than drinking your life away.
You’ve changed. Stop now. Stop.
This is your life. Take shit done. Start baby steps. Make it work.
Hi,
I was in your exact position 2 years ago. I’m 2 years sober and 24 years old now. I understand how isolating and shameful it can feel, and I just wanted to say it can get better, as long as you’re willing to make the change. Look up your local AA meeting – I had reservations about religion etc, but it’s not religious, it’s spiritual, and it works. Also, go to reddit.com/stopdrinking – that’s where I first went when I was struggling. Make a post. People will help you. I went from utterly despairing, depressed, wanting to die, hating myself, drinking to blackout and regularly taking cocaine without being able to stop, to today having my own flat, a full-time job, in therapy and improved relationships throughout my life. Fundamentally, I’m okay with myself. I don’t wake up filled with dread. I can smile, and I am grateful to be alive. I feel like I’m a part of life, instead of on the outside looking in.
If it got bad enough that you posted here, you likely have a problem with alcohol – they say if once you start drinking, you find it difficult to stop, then you’re probably alcoholic, but that’s only something you can decide for yourself.
I really hope you try a meeting, and send you love and best wishes :) You are not alone, and you don’t have to feel that way.
Take care of yourself.
One life.. are u not going to give it ur all? Can a habit or euphoric state define u to such extent that you become so distant from urself ? No.. we form habits n we can break it.. we start our chain of thoughts n we can stop it. You are born to witness the power of being your true self. I dont know what that is but im giving life a tough fight to find out. Come on..lets do this together
You need to get yourself to an AA meeting. You need it. They are there to help you. Don’t quit.
AA isn’t for everyone.
There are also alternatives to AA if 12-step programs don’t appeal to you. I drank a case of beer every night for about 12 years (and somehow managed to keep my job.) I was turned off of AA by the local addictions doctor who was a jerk. It took a while, but I found other alternatives. Start exploring and find a program that works for you.