wasting away

I hate that I waste soo much time
I hate myseeeeeelf.

and when I look back ….nothing seems interesting abt my life..i need to do something bold and life changing but I’m always behind the scene….
!!!!!!

like I don’t even exist!! !!!!!!and my goals are being squashed!!!!!!!!! because I have no capacity to finish what I started!!!!!!!freeeeaaaaaaak…

like I was always a wallflower and i coexists as a wallpaper or a background….and now I cant do much coz I’m always having imaginations that isn’t making me focus on the present and like right now I have a frkng homework to do but I jut cant coz my mind is always wandering away and I know I’m such a spineless freak..always not doing anything brave or thrilling.. like I always want to be somewhere else instead of the present … and I’m wasting away my years. I am always either thinking abt past or future and in the present I’m daydreaming…..and I don’t know why I seek so much of human interaction lately but it isn’t helping either coz my goal is to finish my course but I cant coz my attention span is so short.

and this computer science course needs to be done GENIE NEEDS TO MAAKEEE MAGIIIIIIC.
where is my genie oh I’m the genieee. I CALL MYSELF GENIE.
I’m a useless genieeeeeeeeee. arghhhhhhhh. and

stupid stupid genieeeeeee.
do your thing. now. my dreams of finishing my goal isfloating somewhere faaar away from my hands………………………………………………………………………….
lets be serious genie don’t waste time genie pleeaaase.
time is precious.but.im wasting my time now when I’m writing this confessions. oh my gt.
I spend 30 minutes writing this …
I spend 30 minutes staring at nothing
I spend an hour dilly dallying jhsfajkhjdflsdl
I waste my time always!!!now its 5pm
surprise surprise
I did nothing today. ur so good genie.

One thought on “wasting away

  1. Dear Friend,

    Why not write down all of the things that you’d like to do or should be doing and make yourself start doing some of those things? Having a sense of accomplishment will likely make you feel better about how you’re spending your life and to be more focused. If this does not work, make it a priority to get therapy and learn more about what works for you and how to move ahead. Take care and I hope that this helps.

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