Im a terrible person and a compulsive liar
Posted by Anonymous in Confused on May 22nd, 2011 | 6 commentsI know the majority of people will question if I am telling the truth and I can for once in my life, honestly admit I am. I have the self esteem of road kill. There is nothing about my body that I look. Even now when Im on a diet and exercising, my mum informs me that my bum and legs are too fat. She knows its a touchy subject yet her and my dad continue to ‘joke’ about even though it feels like they are kicking me when Im down. I am studying to be a nurse and yet it won’t sink in that people have far harder lives then I do. I have never kissed a boy since I was 14 due to shyness and Im now 21. Anytime a boy tries on a night out, I reject him for fear he will think Im a bad kisser and insult me (I know by rejecting him, I am insulting him and I feel bad for that). I lie continiously to my friends about boys. Even going as far to make up imaginary boyfriends. (Yes I know Im a loser :(…) I get angry so easily and Im just so tired of life. I want to be a better person and I think if I can improve myself then things will be easier. Please help me. Any asvice would be greatly appreciated and Im sorry about the self indulgent moan.
6 Responses to “ “Im a terrible person and a compulsive liar”
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You are still young and life will get better. Parents can sometimes be cruel without meaning too. They probably think they are motivating you to do better instead of make you feel horrible about yourself. Just be strong and don’t forget things will change for the better. Your obviously liked if guys try to kiss you and you are most likely more attractive than you think.
I think your parents bring you down and it would be much better for you to be away from them. I also suggest therapy, it takes time but you can build yourself back up
Go out tonight and make out with the first guy that gives you some attention. Leave early, go to another club and make out with the next guy that gives you some attention. Fearing rejection is normal – getting over it takes some risk. And practice. This situation… random guys in random places is low risk. You don’t know the guy, he doesn’t know you, and it’s unlikely he’s going to criticize your kissing skills 10 minutes after met you. Learn from him, try it out on the next guy until a guy says “wow, you’re a great kisser!”. That problem solved. (Don’t know how to initiate a kiss? Stare at him in the eyes while he’s talking and turn your head slightly to the right. When he stops talking and stares back at you, pull back and say “do you want to kiss me?”. If he says no, act relieved, and say “OH! You looked like you wanted to kiss me there!”. He’ll be embarrassed, and you’re off the hook.)
To stop lying… you have to be honest. That means confessing your lies to your friends and family and facing the embarrassment and humiliation that comes with it. Yeah… it SUUUCKS. But the more you face your own lies, the harder it becomes TO lie.
To get your parents to quit with the comments – go overboard. Use profanity, a loud voice, and express your full anger at their comments. Insult them back. Make a scene. Guaranteed your family will tiptoe around the subject from then on.
To make any of these changes permanent, you have to get out there and change yourself. Join some clubs (a running club would be a good start), take some ‘fun’ classes, and learn to enjoy yourself. No one is going to like you if you don’t learn to like yourself. And that problem is between you and yourself.
Well, your parents are definitely not helping your confidence AT ALL. But you need to realize that just because they say hurtful things, that doesn’t mean everyone else will.. Who cares if you’ve never kissed a boy? There is NOTHING wrong with that.. Don’t think you have to now, just because you’re getting older and haven’t yet.
You’ll meet someone that cares about you so much, and YOU care so much about, neither of you will care if it’s a bad kiss or whatever. None of that stuff matters A BIT when you find someone who really cares. Don’t think you have to hurry it up.
I’ll kiss you ;)
Yep, your a loser. Now get over it. I know it sounds harsh. I have had liars in my life and they ruin peoples lives. Now stop feeling sorry for yourself and stop BEING a loser. Write your parents a letter and explain how you feel when they say these things. Tell them that you want them to be proud of you. What did your friends do to deserve your lies? They will find out and you will lose even more. Stop putting yourself down so much. There is nothing wrong with not having a boyfriend at that age. I had my first at 23. Did not feel the need to and never lied about it. I was confident, but I just wasn’t very interested in boys at all. I loved being single, because it gave me freedom. You say there are bigger problems in the world, yet not having kissed a boy is such a big thing to you, you are willing to lie about it. just stop and be a big girl.