I feel things too deeply.

And I’m not implying anything physical or sexual. I mean emotionally. I feel emotions deep down to my very soul, to an extent that just wrecks me. Everything, even the smallest things – they just stab at my heart. World events. Tragedies that happen to people I don’t know. I cry all the time. I feel things on a level that I’m not sure many people will understand. I even feel horribly sad when I read fiction or watch movies. This sensitivity feels like such a curse.

8 thoughts on “I feel things too deeply.

  1. Hey, I have the same issue. And I have come to find being on cymbalta and abilify medications help with the over use of my emotions. You should honestly tell your doctor. It can lead to deep depression feeling such entente emotions.

  2. Sometimes I think if I let myself feel emotions the way you do then it would consume me. And that scares me. But instead I feel nothing. I end up mimicking what other people’s emotions are just to appear normal. So for me I envy people like you. Don’t be ashamed of your emotions, it’s actually a likeable trait. It shows that you’re
    human.

  3. Holy Moly! My wife and I just watched a Japanese film called “If Cats Disappeared from the World” and we’re cat people. It’s about a lot more than cats, but suffice to say I’m out of tears.

    I also just recently binge watched a bunch of Crash Course videos on philosophy and ethics and happened to get half way through #38 which is about Aristotle’s theory of virtue with regards to ethics. I’m not going to explain it here because the video does a better job than I could possibly do: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrvtOWEXDIQ

    That said, I think a couple of the previous comments touch on what I consider to be a decent solution to consider for your problem.

    Let me start by saying that––depending on who you talk to––one of two things is happening right now. Either a) the world is going to shit, or b) it’s actually better than before, but the Internet has made it easier to be aware of how awful things are. Before I go on, I must acknowledge that the latter view is supported by history and statistics.

    But which view is correct is actually irrelevant, because both of those things are outside of your control and suffering is just bad no matter how little of it there is. And this is where Aristotle and virtue enter the picture. If I’m allowed to simplify things, virtue is doing your best. Now of course doing your best is subject to interpretation but as I mentioned some previous comments touched on this.

    First and foremost in the quest for virtue is health. You can’t be at your most virtuous if you’re somehow debilitated by these intense feels. The first comment mentioned some pharmaceuticals which I think we can all safely say we’re on the fence about. The key of course is applying them correctly, which as the first commenter said is up to professionals. Just get a few opinions because we know how some doctors like those pretty pharma reps and fancy dinners.

    The third comment also addresses health but in another way that may or may not be available to you. This is simply the ability to turn it off. There’s a great book on this called “The Psychopath Test”. Of course I don’t encourage psychopathy, but there’s an excellent chapter in there that talks about how some situations simply require that you disconnect from your feelings in order to get a job done (e.g., high-stakes surgery). I’m not sure that anyone can tell you “how” to do this, but if you figure it out, by all means, turn it off so you can regroup.

    And finally, the second comment. This is an important point because sometimes you have to make a choice between feeling or not feeling, and sometimes you’re in such a bind that not feeling is the best option, but then you get caught up in it and lose something very important. This has clearly not happened to you and I would venture to guess will never happen, because your feels are particularly intense.

    And this brings us full circle to why you would even consider being virtuous in the first place (as opposed to just addressing the feels and leaving it at that). The fact is that much of humanity was built on compassion. We really wouldn’t be here without it. If you look up the etymology of “emotion” you’ll note that it’s about getting you to do something. So I think of it as a call to action. A deep one. But like I said, take care of yourself first, but know full well that as you learn to manage all these aspects, every day you grow stronger and more able to do something about all this madness.

  4. Oh and there is just one other thing I would like to mention because I think it is relevant. If you watch the video, you will notice the entire series of lectures in the “Up Next” section, and if you watch some of these and also go back to previous lectures and watch some of those you will notice that there are some very important people who have thought about these things.

    This is––in my opinion––important in two very important ways: a) you should know there are people out there that felt so hard on these topics they devoted their lives to working it out and b) although there may be people in the world that feel what you’re feeling, only a small percentage of them will know about this website, an even smaller percentage will come across your post, and even fewer will have the courage to dig down and say something––and so it’s amazing that we’ve been able to keep around these amazing writings long enough to reach us now.

    Oh and why is it even important that other people, both alive and dead, have or have had the same feels as you? Well because we’re human beings––social animals––that like it or not are often girded up and taken down by the opinions of others.

    1. I have to say, your comment has been the most helpful (and longest) I’ve ever received from anyone — even my own friends — on this topic. Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to my confession. I’m going to watch those videos now.

    2. You are probably a HSP, here is a video to help see if you are:
      The gentle power of highly sensitive people | Elena Herdieckerhoff | TEDxIHEParis

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