Calories and Thumbtacks
Posted by Pyro in Confused on Nov 1st, 2010 | 1 commentMy day rotates around calories.
How many calories can I avoid; how many calories can I work off; how many calories are the total at the end of the day.
For every hundred calories I eat, a line gets written on my wrist underneath a rubber band. Every time the day ends with a positive number of calories left in my system, a line is written (like I eat 400, work off 300, that’s one line). Every time my stomach growls, another line’s written. Every time I want food, another line’s written.
The lines get transferred to the back of my left leg, and scraped in with a thumbtack at night.
I don’t know what I’m doing anymore, especially because no one else believes me when I try to talk.
I’m losing myself…
I’m only thirteen.
One Response to “ “Calories and Thumbtacks”
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at 13 i too struggled with calories, fasted twice a week, binge and purged on other days, so much in my life was beyond my control, so i took some strange pleasure in obsessing controlling my calories and weight. Please speak to someone you trust,I regret that I didn’t.
now all these years later i actually laugh about it because i wouldn’t dare skip a meal, enjoy food way too much and happily so, am I a size 2 no , but nor to I wish to be I am healthy and my body does what I ask it too. but the after effects of the eating disorder the enamel on my teeth is weak, so i now have to replace many teeth with implants, at
$2,000 pop not cheap