Bisexual and Married…

I’m a 37 year old woman and have been happily married to the most wonderful man alive for the past 15 years. My problem is that I have always liked women too. I have always been honest with my husband and told him that I slept with women before meeting him. He has always been very understanding about everything, but I don’t think he really “gets” me being bisexual. He thinks it is something I can just turn off and forget about whenever I want. Recently we have slept with other women together (3-some) and it has been wonderful. On the other hand, though, it has started up all of the woman-lust feelings I have kept buried for the past 15 years and I can’t stop thinking about being with a woman alone again. It is a difficult situation to be in, because he means everything to me and is wonderful as a husband, lover, friend, etc. There is nothing that is missing from our marriage. I just feel the need and urge to be with women too. I don’t know how to deal with my feelings. I guess I have always thought of myself as a woman who “experimented” when she was younger. I am starting to realize that I am in fact bisexual and really don’t know where to go from here….

11 thoughts on “Bisexual and Married…

  1. I’m married bi male, my wife is straight. We used to do MMF, but when HIV became so rampant, she got cold feet and asked me to quit messing around.

    I HAVE! Going on nearly 3 decades, but inside, I’m still bisexual and will always want to be! Whether I do anything physical about it or not…

  2. Hey i am married bi male wife is bi too. Not all the time but we have sex with the same sex on special occassions and enjoy it. Have fun!!!

  3. I’m married and I also have a girlfriend my husband knows we have had sex all three of us but it’s mainly just me and her or me and him. My family and friens etc don’t know and proably never will they believe shes my Nanny only my best friend knows. Talk to your husband and be open, as long as he knows you love him and he always comes first most guys believe it or not wouldn’t care.

  4. even my wife , had relations with a female before ….. more than sad i was happy and now i want to see my wife making love to a women …… and infact we are trying to find a women for her ….so i suggest you to talk to your husband … and may be you he will not have any problem

  5. If that is the ONLY thing missing in your life I would say be grateful for what you have and get over it.
    How selfish can you be?

  6. I am also bi & married, but ive always been honest about it with my husband & he is so understanding & has given me permission 2 have a girlfriend if i want, he is not interested in 3 sums, but if it happens he wouldnt complain … I think if u just talk 2 ur husband about ur feelings, u mite b surprised at his reaction, as u 2 have had 3sums b4 it seems he doesnt mind that u r bi…

  7. My wife is bi-sexual too. We’ve discussed her being with another woman and I understand her desire. Women are beautiful. We haven’t done the threesome thing though. I’d talk to him. The other person who commented is dead on. Tell him your feelings and be ready for the response even if it’s not what you want to hear.

  8. Lots of people want to sleep with other people. Just because it is someone the same sex as you doesn’t make it any different from a your husband wanting to be with another woman (of course, that is hypothetical). Homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, it’s all the same rules unless your husband thinks differently…and if you think you can talk to him about it, then go for it! Maybe let him watch so he doesn’t feel left out…

    1. Very well said. That is exactly what I think.
      Whatever sexual orientation you have, it is always the same rules.
      You can already be happy that he is open for 3-somes.
      If he is very open, maybe he would let you sleep with other girls, but that would be accepting that you “cheat” on him… Men think about sleeping with other women, women think about sleeping with other men, and you think about sleeping with other women.
      It does not change the situation very much…

    2. Thank you for your comment. I agree with what you are saying. I am going to try to talk with him about how I am feeling and go from there. If he is not open to it, then I am going to just have to get over these feelings, because he is the most important thing to me. I appreciate your insight. :)

      1. I applaud your approach to this. He has already shown a willingness to allow for sexual adventure. So, I wouldn’t be surprised if he lets you go for it. But what I really like is your willingness to sacrifice your own desire for the sake of the relationship. Pop psychologists such as Dr Phil say we have to look after our own needs first. That’s crap. True love means forsaking everything else, even self, in order to do what is best for each other.

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