Where are you?
Posted by Anonymous in Childhood on Mar 28th, 2010 | 5 commentsMy mother- the prostitute meth head. I have not talked to her since my 7th birthday when she promised me a barbie dream house. Which I did not get. Last time I saw her, I was about a year old. Her “boyfriend” at the time beat the living hell out of me and the court took me away.
What I would really like to know is
How can she leave her child, abandon her. Does she ever think about me? I wonder if I ever cross her mind.
I’m sorry I wasn’t better than any drug, Mom.
5 Responses to “ “Where are you?”
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Don’t be sorry. You’re clearly better off without her.
I know it may be difficult to understand this right, but believe me your mother loves you with all of her heart and thinks about you everyday. I know it may be hard to understand this right now, as it probably feels like you were never good enough, better than the drugs, etc……but please believe me when I say, she aches deep inside for where things ended up today. She never wanted this for her. She never wanted this for you. She never wanted this for the both of you. The farther away she is from you and the closer she is to her drugs, is usually because the hurt and despair is sometimes to much and often times, for some, there is no fight left and it feels like its easier not to care.
Do know though, you have every right to be angry, hurt and destroyed over the bullshit you had to go through because she could never get her shit together, because the truth is you deserved better than what you probably got.
I promise you the day will come – where you will find peace with the emotions that are probably destroying you. All you can do today is keep doing you and being the best you can be….I promise you it will come.
Hey,
My mother was the best mother that I could ask for, up until I was nine years old. Then, out of the blue, she left. Came back. Left. Came back. And left again. I havent heard from her since I was 11 years old which was 9 years ago. Honestly, I know what you went through is horrible, but think about this, at least she was a bad mother from the start, and you didnt get to see the good side of her.
Stay strong :)
You have to understand the power of a drug addiction. The promises she broke weren’t because she lied, she really did want to get you that barbie dream house, but drugs are POWERFUL. :( Sorry kid
I’m so sorry, but drugs can really **** up a persons head. They are not themselves when they are on drugs, they become addicted and lose sight of whats real. I’m sure if she cleaned up her act, and could see what she did to you, she would be sorry. She dosn’t realize the pain she has caused you. And I’m so sorry. I’m sure she loves you, but drugs have clouded her mind. Meth is the devil’s drug, and it steals away everything. People on drugs become somebody else. You sound like a nice person and I’m sorry you had to go through that. All you can do is learn from her mistake. Good luck. :)