My life….Deserve to be hanged.

Posted by Anonymous in Regret on Aug 30th, 2010 | 4 comments

I hate myself I did horrible things when I was 13 to an older cousin sister when she was sleeping,I am older now 20 and Last few years I realized what I did,Oh my god some nights I think Il take a gun and shoot myself,I cant believe that I look back now,that I did it and I was actually attracted to her…****sake,it sucks,I guess she knows but cant really say like me,I didnt fully rape her just kissed her behind and rubbed my cock on her leg once(typing that made me sick)….I had been molested my self when I was young, a mental guy stuck his tounge down my throught and once he just hugged me rubbing his pelvis on to mine when I was 6/7 i guess….I dont blame him cause he was mental and his parents should have looked after him,it hasnt traumatized me,just really embarrasing and there was a best friend of mine who would try make me gay by playing games where Im the(or he is) the man and he(or sometmes im ) the wife and he would try to get me into bed but I would refuse sexual stuff but he got to feel me sometimes which was what he wanted this was around me being 9-11….I am not mad at any of them one was mental and one was just a kid my age who didnt know right from wrong,but what I did I guess has a connection but I still cant believe I did those things,I just cant…..looking back I just cant believe I did that. Im a sick ******* human being I mean how was I even attracted to her….I just wanted to get these things off my chest, I can never say these things in real life,I hope to be better the rest of my life and do the best I can but especially these past few days the action that I performed,how the ****….makes me sake and some nights the only way I get a sound sleep is that I might just pull a trigger on my head(Im not gonna do it just lie to myself so I can sleep,too scared to,cant let that hang on my family and dont posess a gun)

Oh can I delete this? I just dont want anyone ever I know…to ever read this….even if they dont know who this is.

shes not dead

Posted by jv in Regret on Jul 26th, 2010 | 4 comments

i didnt have a abortion, i gave her up for adoption.im sorry i lied to you, i didnt think you could handle being a teen father.you have a beautiful alive one year old daughter named kyla. and i gave her away to complete strangers who i will never see again. i hate myself more everyday.

I wish I never got married

Posted by Anonymous in Regret on Jul 25th, 2010 | 4 comments

We were better off just as friends. Now I feel trapped, and too proud to get a divorce.

My life was forever changed and all he could do was shrug

Posted by Anonymous in Regret on Jul 12th, 2010 | 4 comments

After a long, dysfunctional “relationship” with a guy who was my friend and lover but never actually my boyfriend, I finally broke free of it. Only to relapse into missing him and hanging out with him once more “as friends” a year later. We had always been ‘drinking buddies’ and thus, the night we hung out we proceeded to have a few beers and hang out how we used to–laughing, watching tv, talking on the balcony. It was a seemingly good turn of the times…

Stupidly, we ended up sleeping together in a very drunken state..him coming onto me, at first I resisted, but gave in. I ended up getting genital herpes from him that night from oral sex. It was my initial outbreak, as proven by bloodtest (lack of antibodies in blood, but confirmation of virus on skin.) He has never shown signs of it, but it turned out to be type 1 –the cold sore variety. Today, I also broke out with my first ever cold sore and it’s HORRIBLE.

This has changed my life, my self-esteem, how I feel about my sexuality, dating, being able to touch my body and now my face.

I was free! Why oh whhhhhyyyy did I hang out with him?!
When I told him, he shrugged. HE SHRUGGED. He refused to get tested, never did. He goes on unphased–symptom-free, probably being careless and not taking precautions with anyone else….and me…I am forever changed.

I wish things were different

Posted by anonymous in Regret on Jul 12th, 2010 | 4 comments

I love my kids,I really do..they are great for the most part..But I wish for a few minutes that I wasn’t a mom, that I could just be myself again.

Leeches

Posted by Mother in Regret on Jul 7th, 2010 | 29 comments

I wish my children were never born.

someone else’s husband

Posted by anonymous in Regret on Jul 4th, 2010 | 4 comments

he is married, i am not. his constant flirtations, at first I thought he was just being fun, after all he flirted like that with everyone. one night he sent me a text telling me he missed me, i said i missed him more.

i found myself looking way too forward to the workday just so i could see him, i would even go in on my days off because i knew he would be there. somewhere along the way i fell for him, hard. he doesn’t know this fact. i have since moved away.

we text, mostly friendly, casual things, but every once in a while he will send something very suggestive, and i am flattered and respond in kind. the attraction is intense. he has offered to come visit me, i have declined. i avoid business trips to his city now, because i don’t think i could control myself. but i can’t delete him from my cell

if i continue to engage his texting is that cheating?

fattycakes

Posted by Anonymous in Regret on Jun 28th, 2010 | 4 comments

i wish i wasnt so over weight, i try as hard as i can, and yet i dont. my mom calls me beautiful everyday and the second i start to really believe it, i look at my stomach, arms, legs, and hips and see why no one else has ever called me beautiful.

Idiot………

Posted by Anonymous in Regret on Jun 27th, 2010 | 0 comments

I don’t know what to say…3 yrs ago I knew that I cared enough about you to marry you. Yet I have lied to you to your face and have hurt you. The times I lied to your face, dispelling overwelming evidence that I cheated, used to sting a little bit before that point. This time was different, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and told you a partial truth to preserve our relationship. I have hurled 4 times, I cant eat, I cant sleep, and I cant stop thinking about how much I love you/cant live with out you. I’m sorry I slept with her, and the others. I’m even more sorry that I inadvertandtly embaressed you in front of other people with the form of evidence in your possesion. Being seperated for months at a time made me weak, and willing to sleep with all these other girls(double digit amount) for selfish pleasure needs. I feel like a scumbag, coward pussy ass bitch, for not being a man willing to tell the whole truth. You know I take marrital vows seriously, and would have/will never let this happen while we were married or engaged. I will never be this kind of man again.
I love her, havent cheated in years and hope she never finds this.

I love him, im sorry.

Posted by Elena in Regret on Jun 18th, 2010 | 2 comments

J, i’ve been thinking about all the things you tell me, the “i love you’s” the “i miss you’s” thats all bull. you just want someone to mess around with. a booty call or some s***. i have a boyfriend who really does love me and would really do anything for me. you’re just talk. i hate it how you have a girlfriend, and i hate it that you make me wanna kiss you. i also hate it that you make me smile. but what i hate the most is that you even exist! ugh, if i would’ve never met you i would be so happy right now, without worries and stuff, now i feel like crap for lying to my boyfriend. you suck! i know it was my decision or whatever but i just wish we weren’t introduced that Friday night. :(
with this, im saying… Goodbye.

if only i could REALLY say all of this.

My little brother

Posted by Anonymous in Regret on Jun 15th, 2010 | 8 comments

If you are readin this, I am 15 years old and have ingaged in a (few) oral acts with my 4 year old brother. I deeply regret this discission and accept the full consequences that come with it and hope not to be discrimnated but helped and spoken to. I was brutally beat as a child and raised around many drugs and alchohol, and have almost committed suiceide twice. My mother was molested and im not sure if my issues have anything to do with this, i have not had anything for my brother except love now and treat him with more respect for his age. i was beat with many objects, so was my mother, locked outside at odd hours of the night and cant continplate the things that happened. so please respond if anyone has advice, i dont know who to speak to and my mother has been molested to so if i told her i would fell like i have been disowned but would accept it in full terms. thank you and im sorry and can never forgive myself for what i have done.

Too many mistakes

Posted by Anonymous in Regret on Jun 2nd, 2010 | 5 comments

I have made SO many mistakes in my life, that I wish I had never been born. I’m really not sure why God would make something so imperfect like me. It makes me question whether there actually is a God.