Currently Browsing: Love

I can still hear her voice…

Posted by in Love on Mar 10th, 2011 | 8 comments

Around 6 years ago I was engaged and happy. I had just purchased a house and started a great job; everything was going very well for me. After a few months on the job I met a coworker I had heard great things about. She was great at her job and she was very easy to get along with. While working with her a few times we really hit it off as friends. We shared ideas and thoughts we enjoyed our company. After a while we started spending time together after work. I would lie to my finace about who I was spending time with, even though I was doing nothing wrong; no physical cheating was going on. My finace finally found out who I was spending time with and she accused me of cheating and kicked me out of my own place, so went to my friend to vent to, then it happened, i cheated on my fiance; no sex, but other things.
I made up with my fiance and we continued our realtionship for a few more months while i continually cheated on my fiance. Eventually i told her the truth and we broke up. After that I was fired from my job because my performance was lacking. I was deeply depressed about what I had done and i was extremely confused about who i was. I shut myself away from everyone I knew (my ex, my friend, my family) and I didn’t speak to anyone for months. While trying to forget everyone and everything I met someone else. She brought me out of my depression and I fell in love with her and we are now married. So many years have passed and while I love my wife a day doesn’t go by that I don’t think about my friend and how much I still love her. The feelings have been getting stronger though I haven’t seen or spoken to her all this time. I don’t know what’s making me feel this way, but it has come to the point where I don’t think I can be happy with my wife as long as I still remember my friend. I have urges to find her and talk to her, but I know it will only make my feelings for her stronger. I truly beleive that I love her and my wife both and I don’t know what to do!

I’m a horrible person

Posted by in Love on Mar 3rd, 2011 | 7 comments

I’ve spent the past 8 months in an on/off fling with a truly wonderful woman. A purer soul there’s never been and now finally we’re officially in a comitted relationship. But there’s something I’ve never told her. There’s a woman that I’m madly in love with. I haven’t pursued her, because she’s spent most of the year thinking I’m kind of a jerk and hating me, and also because she has a boyfriend. I thought it was best to put her out of my mind and move on, which is why I’ve been pursuing my girlfriend. But ever since we made it official, something has felt really, truly wrong in the relationship. It’s not just me. I feel something weird coming off of her too. I do like my girlfriend and I want to make it work with her, but I can’t get the other woman out of my mind. It seems like ever since I started dating my girl, she’s warmed up to me, and we’ve become very good friends. It’s hard to stop falling in love with her. Impossible, even. But I don’t want to leave my girlfriend for something I know can’t be. But every time I talk to her, I catch myself thinking, hoping that maybe each time I make her laugh it’s an inch closer to her returning my affections. I try desperately to put the thought out of my mind, but I can’t. I feel like my soul is tearing itself apart. Infidelity isn’t an option, but whether I stay with my girlfriend or leave her, I won’t be being faithful to myself. Someone help me. I wish I could just ask God what He wants me to do, but I feel like He’s not answering me, and if He is, I’m not listening because I don’t like the answer. All I want is to do the right thing, but I don’t know what that is. Is it right to put the other girl out of my mind, so that I am not even unfaithful to my girlfriend in spirit? Is it right to leave her so that my soul can be free, but she will be heartbroken? I can’t go on like this, because it’s not right to be dating a woman as a way to kill time until the one you want is available.

my pastor sends mixed signals

Posted by in Love on Feb 15th, 2011 | 8 comments

I been going to a church for the last 7 months. I enjoy the pastor he is a young good looking single man that is on fire when it comes to ministering. ALL the thing i love.When I started going there we would meet reguarly. I tried to not fall for him which made it hard cause i started working with him closely and we started calling and texting. Sometimes he would call late at night and if i didnt return the call or text he would ask if i had company.I didnt know how to respond to this cause i felt like thats none of his buiness. Sometimes its all about church than others its just personal conversation.He tells me he is lonely too and he wants a wife.Next thing i know im making doctors appointments i have his social security date of birth all his personal information. He always talk to me about things first before telling others in the church. He have asked to me my outake on marraige and life. He have even self invited his self to dinner at my house twice. But i always find an excuse for him not to come. The other single women in the church are starting to dislike me even comparing my relationship with him is not like theirs.Im confused because i think i am falling in love with him and i dont want to. I mean one day our “friendship” is blooming and than its calms down (primarily cause me cause i dont want to read into him more than it might be). I have asked friends and family about this situation and some stated that this is not healthy and it is going to far.People say i should just ask him.I dont feel comfortable doing so because it would create an akwardness. i have already stepped down from a position with him and he was not to thrill.I have stopped going to church reguarly and I dont call him as much mainly text. i need help!!!!!!!

I don’t even know you

Posted by in Love on Feb 10th, 2011 | 1 comment

You were born in 1983, and your middle name is Elizabeth. You have three black cats, a green Cube, and a black car. (I don’t know what kind.) You teach at my high school, and you used to be a ballerina. You have a second job as a waitress, and you look so good in the uniform. Your eyes are the most incredible things I’ve ever seen. You are straight, and your husband has black hair.

I was born in 1994. Every other day in class, I watch you, and I love every single move you make. I have fantasies about you, and watch the way your body moves while you teach. I’m a lesbian and I have a girlfriend- She’s very jelous about the way I feel for you.

She can get bent. I love you.
I know it will happen someday, and I really can’t wait.
See you tomorrow.

-Z

It’s funny.

Posted by in Love on Feb 9th, 2011 | 0 comments

I think it’s interesting that you’re one of the most mature, talented, funny people on that website. Which is saying something, since you’re REALLY famous there. You get thousands of views within minutes of posting up some art or something comical. (You’re practically a comedian anyways.) You’re freakin’ amazing whereas I’m just somewhat of a normal person, who’s relatively smart, makes decent art, only moderately funny…

… and yet you’re like putty in my hands.

I have it set so every evening when you put up something, I get a notification, and the next day you’ll immediately ask if I thought it was good or not and not say much to the others. You constantly cuddle up to me, and almost seem to treat me like a princess even if I seem to act oblivious or coldly towards this affection. I’d normally think someone with that power and fame would act differently when infatuated, but I guess we’re all human, aren’t we?

It’s interesting how much you seem to like me. I could probably make your day with a simple smile. How easily I could break you if I wanted to, as cruel as that sounds. Don’t think I didn’t see your reaction when I hugged him, that little twitch. It’s strange; only a short while ago, I was desperate for a relationship, yet when I’m given someone like you, I walk the fine line between toying, destroying, and loving. I feel powerful to an extent, and yet…

Hmm. I wonder if I like you? I wonder if you like me, or if you love me?

I don’t know what to do.

Posted by in Love on Jan 18th, 2011 | 11 comments

I have been with my husband since i was 16 years old, we got married when i was 19 and my husband is 7 years older than me. I’m now 24 and have spent the last few years trying my very best to make this marriage work but i can see it falling apart fast, it’s not my husband either it’s me. I don’t think i love him like a wife should love her husband anymore and it breaks my heart to feel this way. 3 years ago we went through some major issues and i ended up leaving, we were separated for 4 months and when he told me he was going to get counseling and was willing to do whatever it took to make this relationship work i moved back in, we saw a counselor together and for a little while everything was going smoothly, now it’s all going south again and i don’t know what to do. I’ve talked to him about this and my feeling depressed and unhappy, he just says it’s the stress of our living situation but i know i can’t keep going like this. I remember when i told my husband i wanted to break things off and separate the look on his face destroyed me, i can’t stand hurting him like that and it’s the main reason why i’m still with him. My husband is a good man but i just don’t love him like that anymore. I have no idea how to break it off, i can’t do this to him again a second time i just can’t. How do i do this? i am totally lost.

For those of you who would make assumptions let me clear it up now, there is not other man in the picture nor have i been looking for one. I take my vows seriously and am a devoted woman. I’m not looking to rush out and find new love or lays, as a matter of fact i’m quite sure i won’t be getting into any kind of relationship other than platonic for a very long time.

for ever and always will you be in my heart

Posted by in Love on Jan 16th, 2011 | 1 comment

You texted me at 6:35 am telling me good morning and wake up sleepy head.
you tell me who you like and who you think is an ass.
you ask me for advise… how to ask someone out.
the truth is i am in love with you. you changed my life and you will never know. if only you can imagine my position. i like you so much i can say no i cant stay mad at you. i answer all of your texts and put feeling into it.
do you even know? your the most amazing person i have met. you changed my world upside down and now it is stuck this way. please. ask me- ask me to see a movie as a friend hang out… not just to block someone from sitting next to you. be the person who i text please for me.

Kissing

Posted by in Love on Jan 16th, 2011 | 14 comments

I turn 16 in April and have yet to be kissed. If I don’t get kissed by the end of March I’m taking desperate measures!

I’m a shallow person

Posted by in Love on Jan 15th, 2011 | 5 comments

I tell people that I look or personality in a woman, that intelligence is important, and that true beauty is on the inside. But really, I only like skinny girls.

To a point where I couldn’t get him out of my head

Posted by in Alone, Love on Jan 13th, 2011 | 2 comments

I have an utterly disgraceful attraction towards this guy-right at the spark of the moment we meet. We both did, and it’s unavoidable.He’s 10 years older than me and he is married with a kid. We have the same way of thinking and chemistry is highly volatile, so much people around us feel uneased. Lately we’ve both been trying to ‘ignore’ it. It’s gotten to the point of awkwardness like for example -
He looks at me, and I look away. I look at him and he looks away. Yes, how very corny!

Funny thing is, he knows I’ve got a boyfriend and I’ve met his wife. I think both of my boyfriend and the wife senses it.

And I can guarantee he talks about me a lot and if I may say so- he has interesting dreams of me from those guilty glares that he should only look at his wife with.

The sick thing is-we both know we’re each others type!
Yet we both know we’re involved with someone and we both are very loyal. Afterall, I do love my boyfriend too, just not all the same ways.

Some might say I’ve just settled for someone for companionship sake.
Fact is- I think there’s many types of marriage of love.

Getting him out of my head

Posted by in Alone, Love on Jan 13th, 2011 | 0 comments

I know what that sort of feels like. I have an utterly disgraceful attraction towards this guy-right at the spark of the moment we meet. We both did, and it’s unavoidable.He’s 10 years older than me and he is married with a kid. We have the same way of thinking and chemistry is highly volatile, so much people around us feel uneased. Lately we’ve both been trying to ‘ignore’ it. It’s gotten to the point of awkwardness like for example -
He looks at me, and I look away. I look at him and he looks away. Yes, how very corny!

Funny thing is, he knows I’ve got a boyfriend and I’ve met his wife. I think both of my boyfriend and the wife senses it.

And I can guarantee he talks about me a lot and if I may say so- he has interesting dreams of me from those guilty glares that he should only look at his wife with.

The sick thing is-we both know we’re each others type!
Yet we both know we’re involved with someone and we both are very loyal. Afterall, I do love my boyfriend too, just not all the same ways.

Some might say I’ve just settled for someone for companionship sake, fact is- I think there’s many types of marriage of love.

Wow

Posted by in Love on Jan 12th, 2011 | 1 comment

I can’t believe 18 years mean’t so little. I feel so used confused and damaged. You could throw it all away for a man who doesn’t actually love you. Will I ever know real love?

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