I can’t stop cheating
Posted by Anonymous in Alone, Sex on May 5th, 2011 | 29 commentsI have been with the girl of my dreams for 6 years, and yet I can’t stop cheating on her. I crave the thrill that comes with every new chase. I’ve had relationships on the side, ranging from a one night stand to a one year relationship.
We just graduated from college, and talking about getting married. I don’t know how to tell her that she can do so much better.
29 Responses to “ “I can’t stop cheating”
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Sir, stop being an idiot. Don’t lose everything you have with sowing your wild oats. Definitely don’t get married while you are still having multiple relationships.
Otherwise, you will end up breaking a lot of hearts, including yours (and hers) family.
you are trying to fill some sort of emotional void with sex and sneaking around. you sound way way too immature to get married. do your girlfriend a favor and send her a letter and explain what an immature jerk you are.
Don’t get married, you clearly aren’t ready
Please don’t get marry her. If you love someone you need to let them go, sometimes, and you need to let her go. You are doing her a great disservice. Cheating is one of the worst things you can do to a person. Your relationship with her will not get better, but only worse as her finding out is inevitable. Don’t set either of you up now for a messy divorce in the future. You need some kind of help.
Also, to be brief: stop being so damn selfish!
wow! of course she can do better than you! one day your going to regret all the bad things youve done to her, you clearly say shes the girl of your dreams and still dont appreciate her!?
if you continue like that, your only going to end up alone.
Its alright man I hear you. I actually in a really similar situation. Tag em and bag em man you are only young once- thats been my philosophy so far with moderate success. Last night a chick and I went through an entire container of peter pan peanut butter and my three year girlfriend has no idea.
You seem to be not ready to be in a committed relationship right now. There is nothing wrong with that. You are still very very young. Most people do not last with a high school sweet heart. I met my current husband when I was 15 in highschool. I am not 23 and we are engaged and have a child together. I used to cheat on him CONSTANTLY. The only thing that will happen is hurt feelings, guilt, shame, and anger. I understand how you feel like you don’t want to end the relationship, but you can’t be selfish. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. You MUST decide if you want to commit to this girl for the rest of your life, or if you want to be single, date around, and not be tied down at such a young age. My advice is to end it now before she gets hurt any more. I almost suggest not ever telling her what you have done. I told my boyfriend EVERYTHING…his first response was “I really wish I did NOT know..why did you tell me this?”….so ignorance is bliss..but ONLY if you stop what you are doing. Do her and yourself a favor and end the relationship. Don’t you think you would enjoy being single for a while at your age? you can get that thrill all the time! and not have to feel guilty for it! Good luck :)
1) Sit her down
2) Tell her what you’ve been doing
3) Decide whether or not to fix the relationship
If you can’t give up what you’re doing, you have to get out of her life. No one deserves to be cheated on. If you really do love her, and she’s the girl of your dreams…you would stop this madness and give her what she deserves.
You’re stupid and selfish. She could do so much better. You should confess and leave her.
I have issues with affairs while married. Men who know i am married.. i know how you feel you love the person but feel yet trapped.
Get married-that way you can have an affair instead of this nickle-and-dime cheating.
I’m really sorry to have to tell you this but:
ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FREAKIN’ MIND?! You’ve got the girl of your dreams, the one every men wants but so few get, and you are still cheating on her?! I’m not going to advise you to leave her or tell her what you’ve done because that would only hurt her even more. What you have to do is stop cheating on her and realize what you have before it’s too late and you lose her.
Just stop.
Tell her the truth & let her be.
If not, you will be carrying a heavy guilt for taking away a part of her life that she could have spent not being lied to.
If you really do love her, let her go.
Nothing to fix, what has been done can’t be undone.
Just be single & do whatever you want without the whole relationship thing going with anyone.
You already figured out how to get sex when married sex stops….took me first 8 years of being married.
How can you be so disloyal to a person you love? It’s kinda disgusting…. I thought people like you were just in movies and TV shows but I guess I’m wrong. I guess I’m a little under age to truly understand the “thrill” since I’m only 13 but still don’t you understand how hurtful you are being? Now I am terrified that one day I will fall in love with someone like you. It would really just be better for you to let her go than hurting her like this.
commitment isnt for everybody.
If you can’t stop cheating, you’re going to end up a lonely, old person.
You’ll constantly cheat on every person you fall in love with, and sabotage all of your relationships.
One day, you’ll be 50, wake up, and realize you’re still alone, with that void inside, and no partner by your side to help you feel better.
I’ve been cheated on, my a woman I loved very much. She was my wife.
Now, we aren’t even friends.
And she’s not even with any of the men she cheated on me with. What a shame.
I realize that I was acting like a loser. I should have never married a loser who was crying all the time. A beautiful, sexy, loser chick.
They are super disguised. Gorgeous, funny, charming, fun, interesting, cool women. These are the women.
But their secret, their dark secret – they can’t keep their panties on. They love the thrill of feeling like an emotional victim.
And so they cheat. And cheat. And Cheat.
But Karma… you see, my friend.
Karma catches up.
The rolls always balance.
A woman was yelling at me today. Screaming at the top of her longs.
30 minutes later, she came home and her car was crashed. Haha. She was so angry she crashed her own car.
That’s an analogy for YOUR LIFE.
But there’s no insurance policy for your life.
Once you’re totaled… it’s game over.
ACTION STEP:
Go immediately buy the book: The 6 Pillars Of Self Esteem by Dr Nathaniel Branden.
This book will help you solve the problem of cheating and lying.
Peace
It won’t get any better and a marriage will not make it so. I too have a hard time staying faithful and I have been married for 10 years. I have been with one man (other than my husband) for the last year. I want to tell you that it gets better with time and that you won’t cheat once your married but I’d be lying. Whatever you do DO NOT TELL HER. Telling her is for yourself and selfish; if you feel guilty the best thing to do is leave. If you don’t and can live with yourself as I have, then continue. I wish you the best of luck!
Thanks for sharing this information. Does your mate know that you’re cheating? Were I in your shoes, I would not get involved with anyone romatically and that would free me to have as many sex partners as possible. If you don’t change your behavior, you will likely break the hearts of a number of women, be at risk of STDs and bring unwelcomed voilence into your life. Is it worth it? You decide but you might want to look into Sex Anonymous and definitely don’t get married. You are not ready for it. Good luck.
DON’T GET MARRIED TO HER IF YOU LOVE HER. There was a science experiment done on people that had a certain chemical. People that have more of this chemical can be with one person for the rest of there lives, while people that don’t have enough have to be with more people than one. I’m not sure if this is true but you are not a one women type of guy, why even go through the unneeded drama of marriage?
Not to sound critical, but the buzz word here is “selfishness.” You may not be able to see it at the moment, but you are in a state of narcissism where your personal interests are in control. That’s not an insult — it’s an observation. Most people your age are in that state (most people never grow out of that state). The problem is that narcissism is poison to relationships (and certainly to marriage) because a healthy relationship requires that both parties have matured beyond their own egos/selfishness. Whether you continue to exist in this state is up to you, but it is at least clear that getting married (or even continuing the relationship without coming clean) is not an option if you have any desire to be a good person, which it sounds like you do. Best to you.
Yes I think this person is extremely selfish but mostly a sex addict. He would greatly benefit from attending SEX ANONYMOUS groups.
Oatoen is right – you sound like you are too much of a narcissist to be married. Too immature. When I go to weddings and there is a sign-in book for good wishes to the bride and groom here is what I always write:
“May you recognize in each other the same nature, the same needs, the same rights and the same destiny as you do in yourself..” I am over age 45 and have been married over 20 years. Marriage is a task – it’s not a never ending love affair.
Don’t get married if you are not willing to work at a task and be faithful. Would you want your partner keeping secrets–sexual affairs & such – from YOU?
She is obviously not the girl of your dreams if you can’t stop cheating on her! Don’t waste her time anymore and break it off. She doesn’t deserve to be treated that way.
Hey anonymous – I hope that this fella has stopped cheating by now on this poor young lady or has separated from her so that he can see as many women as he wants. And if he has done neither, he is a real a**hole and deserves nothing good.
NEVER get married. You’ll always fall into the 50% divorced category.
You may not have the brain hardwiring for monogamy….think long and hard before you tie the knot.
what goes around comes around boy. people like u will pay in agony