girls
Posted by anonymous is ok in Alone on Mar 6th, 2011 | 6 commentsi have no money, no friends and no interests but i am dieing for a female companion. i know i have nothing to offer, i am a good person but it does not matter. i feel sick every time i get close to a girl i like, and i know that she also likes me, but i just can not find it in my heart to talk to her about anything because i know it is better for her to not get involved with me. she may think that she would like to know me better (at least in my mind)but i feel that the truth is i am protecting them all from getting involved with some one who has nothing to offer. it kills me. i want to have some one in my life, but i just can not do it…will my feelings ever change? help.
6 Responses to “ “girls”
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why do you believe that? -i always believed that there is something beautiful in everyone.- so i m very curious.
there surely is something you enjoy to do.
Why dont you let them decide instead of doing it for them. They can take you or leave you as you are. It might last a week. It might last a month. You’ll know when you know this one is going to be a lifetime, that they are the right one. :)
Get a job and work for your money. Problem solved, it will help your self esteem also.
Why don’t you let other people use their judgement for once, rather than your own? If you’re both adults, you can each make your own decision, hopefully for the benefit of the other.
Girls have a thing called a ‘desperation-detector’ built into their subconscious. When they are around you the needle is on the red and it tells them to get far, far away. You can try to hide it with Axe and Old Navy, but there is no fooling the desperation detector because it sees right into your soul. There is hope for you yet, though. One day you will just give up. You’ll accept a life of loneliness forever. You will not care what girls think because what’s the point? You’ll be able to make fun of your ridiculous self and suddenly girls will want to be around you because they do not feel that weird pressure to tell you ‘no’ as soon as you think you have a chance. Then something strange will happen. They will compete for your attention! That’s right, little old you. One day, my friend, but probably not for a while.
Listen up: You need to love yourself before you can expect anyone else to love you. I know it sounds clichéd, but it’s true. The question you need to ask yourself is why do you feel you have nothing to offer? Trust me, you have something to offer. (Even my ex, who everyone calls “The Devil,” had something to offer.)
When you are not satisfied with yourself, it is easy to feel alone and difficult to have enough confidence to go out and get what you want out of life. It seems to me that it is not just “female companionship” you need. You need to overhaul your life.
I want you to do something: get out a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. (I know it sounds stupid, but just do it. No one’s around to make fun of you. And besides, what else are you gonna do right now?) On one side, write down as many good things about yourself that you can think of. This may be difficult, but do it. There may only be one or two things, but that’s okay. They may be small things, but, trust me, there is something good in you. Or better yet, put them on sticky notes and put them on your mirror or all over your room, so you can look at them every day to remind yourself what makes you amazing. I don’t care if it’s something as seemingly-insignificant as being able to fold fitted sheets or make perfectly crispy bacon. It’s something. (And some people really appreciate those talents.)
On the other side, write down everything you don’t like about yourself or wish you could change. Then ask yourself how you can change. You say you have no interests? Try a new hobby. Seriously. Goggle hobbies if you need some ideas. You say you don’t have friends? Go out and get some. Yeah, yeah. I know, it’s easier said than done. Join a chat, volunteer, go to church (if you’re into that sort of thing), get out of the house. Go stand in line at the grocery store and chat up strangers, if you have to. Go take a walk in the nearest park. At least it’ll get you used to approaching people. Hell, I’ll be your friend! (And I’m pretty amazing. You’d be lucky to have me.) You say you have no money? Get a job if you don’t already have one. You may not have much money even then, but you don’t want a woman who only wants a guy with money.
And don’t fold up that list and put it away. No. Tape that paper up somewhere where you will have to see it every day.
You are full of hidden treasures waiting to be discovered, but you’re gonna have to do the work. Don’t wait around for someone to make you whole, because no one can do that for you. It begins with you. Start doing one thing every day to bring that person into your life, and become the best possible version of yourself. Even if they are seemingly small, insignificant things, they’ll add up. It’s okay to start small.
All of this down-talk is like bad energy (work with me here, I know I sound like a fruitcake). Every time you tell yourself you’re not worth anything, you put that bad energy out into the universe. You are telling the universe that you aren’t deserving of anything good, so the universe complies. Start putting positive energy out into the universe. Tell the universe to send some beautiful, understanding girl your way. Someone who will love you for who you are…which is amazing, by the way. But first, you need to tell the universe you deserve her. Because you do. Or, rather, you will.
Best of luck to you.