Secret Confessions

I’m inlove with an older women, she’s 20 something and i’m 14. I’ve tried so hard to impress her, and she still can’t tell that im inlove.It could be bacause, she’s not lez like i am, or maybe because I haven’t tried hard enough. I don’t know. All i know is that i’m crazy out of the world inlove with her and the one thing that really bothers me is that she doesn’t even know. Why can’t i just tell her. You know, say,”Elizabeth, I im in love with you.”
Why did i have to fall for someone older then i am, someone who isn’t like am, and someone who prbably doesn’t go for the whole bi/homosexual, because she’s a christian who follows the bible?

About a year ago I tried to kill myself. I felt as though nobody loved me and that my life was worthless.I was getting bad grades and was being sexually abused by my neighbor. I also ws having feelings toward the same sex, and I knew my parents would disown me if they found out.I felt like I had nothing to live for and just wanted to “checkout early”.I was already on medicines for depression and ADHD but they wernt helping so I was taken off them.But they were still in my cabinet. So on that night I took about 45 antidepressants and about 30 ADHD pills and waited to die. At about 2am my mother heard me throwing up and took me to the hospital.She didnt know exactly what I did but she knew it was bad. It was too late to pump my stomach so I was put on an IV and given charcoal to make me have diarreha. The doctor said if I would have come in an hour or so later I would have died. After 2 weeks in the ICU I was taken to a mental instutution for another 2 weeks. Since then my life has straightened out and I’m doing 100% better than before,but I have had to live with this secret and it feels so good to get it off my chest.If you are contemplating suicide please talk to sombody.I know you think nobody cares but trust me alot of people would be heartbroken if you were gone forever.
Thank You for Listening,Jane Doe

First, I wrote a letter to you on LJ for a community which has people put in letters, lists, and whatever on stuff they’ll do before they go. Here, I confess again. I love you. I’m getting sick of typing that. I actually want to say it. But hell, what if I do? What happens to us? Do you even like me? It’s painful, you know. And confusing as hell. There are times when I just want to break down and cry. Last night, I put the songs on my computer on shuffle, and all the songs that began playing reminded me of you. I almost cried. When we spend time together, I act as if there’s nothing. They tell me I shouldn’t do that. I shouldn’t, probably. Yet again, I return to that particular night when we both got drunk, when they said we kissed. Did I kiss you? Or did you kiss me? Okay. I should stop going back to that. And I should stop this. I need sleep. I’ll see you anyway tomorrow. Another day with you. Right. Let’s see if something else happens. Hopefully, you’ll do something. Help me here. Please.

We fight a lot, then we’re happy again. It’s always like that. But every time we fight, it feels like love’s gonna end completely between us at that time! and I HATE THAT! And sometimes we doubt each other! I wanna throw those doubts away but I have problems in trusting people and he wish he could trust me but because of what his ex-gf did to him, he finds it hard to trust girls! Like WTF! I just wanna be happy! We don’t call, text, chat or even go out as often as we used to! It’s like watching everything falling apart! I wanna let him go but I can’t coz I still love him so much! Feels like I’m caught in between! And I just wish I could show and tell him how much I love him and that I’m far different from his damn ex! He’s been the best thing that’s ever happened in my life and I wish he knows that! I’m not even sure if he still loves me or not. I get so ******* sad and broken just thinking about us acting this way! Coz I don’t like it! Why can’t I make him HAPPY! Why am I trouble! Why am I a burden! God I JUST WANNA BE HAPPY WITH HIM!!!

I love a man who is already in a relationship. I had my chances with him when he was single but I let him go. My own fault! I find it diffucult to move on. I told him yesterday that I still loved him but his response was silence as he didn’t know what to say. I blew it! :(

I hate society, my work is all about persuade people to adquire things they dont need, or that are just bad for them…

The most part of my work is against my personal values :(

Capitalism SUCKS! We are living in a time where people buy buy buy buy and trhow away all the time, this is bad for everyone, exept for the ones who make money from it (and not so much)

I really wish to kill someone.
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my “father” was kicked out of our home when I was 11. He never spent time with us or sent us anything. He had left us 7 kids and our mom to fend for ourselves.
I had seen him 3 times since then. When I was first married (he acted like he was there all alog). Once when he visited my sister and once when he was on his death bed.
I am now 51. Why does it hurt when we went through his stuff to get it all ready to sell? Especially the photos of him and his wife, who he had an affair with before he was out of our home, going on cruises and the like wwhile we were left literally living on day old Dunkin Doughnuts that my mom would bring home from her overnight job?
She had to work so hard to raise us all.
His wife would claim that she was a brave woman for what she did. The nerve of her!
Why does this all hurt so much still?

I haven’t seen her, not really, not more than a passing glimpse or work-related conversation, in two weeks. We’ve only had a few short telephone conversations and exchanged some hurried text messages. I tried to arrange a meeting sometime in the last two days, but it hasn’t worked out. Our spouses have gotten in the way.

It’s probably best that we didn’t meet, that she didn’t call. Ultimately, this is my problem. I’ve got to figure it out myself somehow.

They separated us at work, said we were spending too much time together. Since then, I haven’t been sleeping well. Nothing seems right. She said in a text that she finds work to be a lonely place without me. I find my entire life lonely without her, completely devoid of anything good or right or worthwhile–it’s meaningless. I love her. I miss her. It’s as simple and as complicated at that. I haven’t gotten over her, though I’ve been trying for years. I’ve only fallen harder, deeper. Not realizing it, I had been living for those few scattered minutes with her throughout the work day, when I could look into her eyes, touch her hand, kiss her cheek, hear her voice, her laugh. I’ve died a little bit every time she said that she loved me too, knowing that she didn’t mean it in the same way that I do, and that she’d never say it first.

Now they’ve taken what little bit of her I had in my life away from me, and I’m lost. I don’t know what to do or how to get beyond it. Every day without her is more painful than the one before. If I say anything to her, as I almost did–that’s why I wanted to meet her yesterday and today–it would probably finish what they started and drive her out of my life completely because our jobs and our families are too important, aren’t they?

YOUMAKE ME FEEL SOME TYPE OF WAY, I JUST CAN’T EXPLAIN IT.LIKE I FIND MYSELF SMILING FROM JUST LOOKING AT YOU. FOR SOME REASON, I’M STARTING TO FEEL LIKE ALL MY DREAMS ARE STARTING TO COME TRUE.

i have been with my boyfriend for nearly 7 months, and it is my longest relationship by far, but since august he has been in hong kong for a gap year. i managed to raise the money to go see him for 2 weeks, and im going in about 5 weeks
but i get irrationally scared sometimes
the past 3 months have been so hard already, and recently we nearly broke up because we kept arguing, but we solved it the day after luckily
i get scared because if these 3 months have been this hard, what about when i come home and have to be away from him for another 7/8 months - over twice the time ive struggled though to date
and i get scared that it will changed him. hes in the year group above me so im doing my last year at college - high school for american readers - living with my mum, without a job etc, hes working nearly everyday, in a foreign country with completley different cultures

im afraid that when he comes back he will be a grown up while i’ll still be a child

im afraid that he’ll outgrow me

im afraid he’ll change his mind and find my immatureness annoying instead of cute

im afraid he’ll stop loving me and leave me

im afraid i’ll end up like my mother, alone and unloved at 45

i need his love to be happy
i need his love to survive
i was so close to hurting myself when we nearly ended. i dont want to find out what’ll happen if we do end

i love him so much it phsyically hurts sometimes

Ok so heres the deal, i’m 15 and she’s 21/22.Crazy huh…
So everysince i met her, i’ve started having these strange feelings towards her, that i never felt before.
When i was 13, i started having strange feelings toward other girls and every since then i’ve tried to hide it. I was doing great, until she came into my life.
Now it’s hard for me because i really like this person and may actual be inlove, but can’t tell her because i don’t want her to think i’m some kind of an idiot. She doesn’t even know that i’m not straight, so what do you think her reaction would be if i told her i liked, liked her? it wouldn’t be good. that’s not the only problem, She’s straight. How am i suppose to hide my feelings from her when i’m always around her? Also if you know about the bible, then you’d probably know that a girl and a girl and a guy and a guy being together goes against gods word. She happens to be a christian who follows gods word and right now, i’m currently learning about the bible so then that way i could become a christian, but my heart is getting in the way. What should i do, Follow my heart or Don’t follow my heart and keep it to myself? Man can my life get any more complicated.

I love a girl so much i cant descibe. she had a breakup with her x. but she is floating and have crush on somebody else as he very gud looking. But she is closest to me and we r the ones who talk most…..i’m afraid….very afraid to ask her as i don’t want it to go the other way and even loose the friendship that i have…

i know that i was wrong to not have listened to you. i know i wasn’t there the way i should have been. i know the arguments were too much to handle. i know that you needed me physically and emotionally and i know that you are still in love with me. we can make this work if you would just trust me with your heart again. i swear i will never hurt you again. i love you too much. after all of the tears, arguments, and pain, i’m still in love with you. change doesn’t happen over night, but trust me, it does come. and i am doing this all for you.

I love my boyfriend to bits and could never imagine my life without him. We have a great sex life. However I frequently fantazise about women. I read lesbian erotica and it really turns me on.

There. I said it.

And on top of that I’m a Christian and I have lots of very Evangelical friends. If they knew how I sometimes feel about women…