Before you go on about being inspired by Dexter and shit like that, I think Dexter is ******* stupid. Anyway I’ve just been having urges to kill people and watching them die. Not with a gun, with a blunt weapon or a blade. I’ve been fantasizing about impaling people in my family and other people that need to be killed. Especially “thugs” that go around saying they will fight anyone and “spark some ************* but will never actually do it. I’ve come close to killing someone, and I would have if there wasn’t other people around. I’m just waiting for a self-defense scenario where I can actually just kill someone. And no, I’m not some angsty emo faggot in middle school trying to be edgy.
I yell at my 5 1/2 year old son too much.
I have been bulimic for the past 6 years of my life. Only 3 people know for sure. For the first time in many years, I want to shout it from the rooftops. I don’t know how my loved ones will take it, the fact that it’s been so long and they haven’t realized it. The world crushed me when I was 16 and now I’m fighting back. I finally love myself and I want to let everyone know.
I often wished I was crazier so I can threaten people and go through with it. People think I am weak, but I want them to know not to **** with me. I have threatened people with boxcutters and knives, but sadly I cannot go through to stabbing them… I don’t feel like living sometimes, but I gotta march through. I have a lot of feelings, but I am too intense for people that I rather not share them… Yeah.
I was anorexic from late eighth grade until my senior year of high school. I used to black out in the shower, black out in class, black out in my boyfriend’s hot tub, and once I blacked out in front of my parents in LAX. My step-dad was the only one who said anything about it, so I don’t know if everyone else just didn’t notice or if they were too nervous to ask me if I had an eating disorder. Regardless, I’ve been pretty healthy since I graduated in 2009. I don’t eat fast food or drink soda and try to eat minimally processed foods and organic produce. But earlier this month I just stopped eating for a couple weeks. I’d eat yogurt for breakfast or have a piece of fruit, but no real meals. The weird part was that I didn’t get hungry at all. I could see my midsection shrinking in the mirror. It made me realize that I could probably go from being a size 12 back to an 8. It’d be so easy because I wouldn’t get hungry if I stayed hydrated and only ate at certain intervals. I don’t know how long it would take, though. Maybe a couple months? I’m pretty active. And the friend I live with is so self-absorbed that she wouldn’t notice. I think the only thing holding me back is the fear of passing out while driving, because I’m always on the road. Still… it would be so easy.
I am afraid of you….. your wife and child are not good enough for you, and you would leave them for me. But really would you? Do you love me, or are you just saying so because the sex is great. Do we really love each other? That’s is, right? The sex. Your whole family would hate you. Your daughter wouldn’t like me at all for breaking apart her parents, and I could never be around your family for being the classic “home wrecking whore”. Plus, will they even speak English around me? Doubt it. You know this will never work, and so do I, so why do we torture ourselves? Once the sex gets old, we’ll both move on, but now that “feelings” are in the mix it will just hurt. You will inevitably find some other beautiful girl who is smart and interesting just like me. We would make a perfect couple if we already didn’t have separate lives. Hope you find what makes you happy…
I’m a working mom of a 2 1/2 year old boy. I’ve been considering getting my tubes tied. I don’t think I want another kid, one seems to be enough for me. I’m on BC right now but I’m afraid of an accident happening. Should I get my tubes tied?
I am 16 turning 17 in five weeks and ever since I was born I have had an extremely weak immune system anyway, my doctors noticed some cold strain that we can’t cure and I have been getting progressively weaker they have said that I won’t be able to attend school much longer and have said that I will probably die before or very shortly after my next birth day they recommend I leave school in 2 weeks. My school has been notified of my condition and now even students know I just don’t want to be treated differently.
My crazy step Dad kicked me out when I was 15, I mange to finish high school early, and I joined the army at 17, met a girl got married at 18. At 23 I was a college grad, a husband, and a father with two kids and a third which turned out to be a set of twins on the way. I never got the time to be a single young guy. Maybe it was turning forty this past year, but lately I felt as if my life was all wrong and it was choking me. An opportunity came up in my company’s international division. It’s basically a liaison/coordinator for our new Central & Eastern Europe Offices. I applied just for kicks, never thinking I would get the job, but I did. I’m going to be gone a great deal of time. My wife wasn’t thrilled about my new job, but I told her we are going to have four kids in college basically at the same time, and this job will lift a tremendous amount of financial pressure off. Saying that calmed her down and smoothed things over. Truth is I can’t wait to leave, I finally get to have some alone time to figure out things about myself. I have never lived alone, I never had that time to be a carefree single guy. Now I feel like I do, and for the first time in a long time, if ever I feel alive. I’ll be leaving for London at the start of February, then on to Berlin to set up, then I’ll spend the next few months just traveling all over Central & Eastern Europe. I’ll be home in May and June but July I’ll be back in Berlin. I know I sound like a jerk and I should feel bad, but I don’t. For the first time in my life I wake up and feel like my life is finally right.
I been struggling all my life. Depression and now voices. I have always been different than others. Everyday I struggle. I have brief moments of happiness then hell again. I sit on the computer all day and smoke cigarettes. I am afraid of other people. I have not had a friend since I was young. Faith gets me through this. Why do I live though when life seems mundane with no one to talk to. At least I’m sober. This medication doesn’t seem to work. I’ve been on medication most of my life but it doesn’t seem to get better. If I could kill myself I would have done it already.
Been without sex for seven months it is getting really frustrated. We are best friends. We have talked this over and he tells me I am free to go get it elsewhere. What man says that to the woman he supposedly loves. He says he can’t pretend to lie there and enjoy it. He spends more time texting his ex and his friends than spending time with me. I have considered throwing the towel in but i love him. The sex when we dud have it was great. I have been thinking bout this and all i want is a normal relationship. I did tell him that i was willing to work on this but everytime i try he has something come up or there is no interest. The self satisfaction thing is getting boring esp when one is in a relationship. Just getting hurt angry and second guessing our relationship.
The other day I went on a date with a guy I’d been seeing for a few weeks. I drank too much and he pissed me off. I blacked out and woke up in bed with a stranger. We had sex and the guy I was dating told me to **** off via text. I am so embarrassed. I don’t know who the guy was that I slept with. I don’t remember anything that happened up to the point of having sex with this stranger. I feel so ashamed that I mistreated the guy I was dating. But he was a jerk to me that night. I hate feeling so out of control of my actions.